Peppy's Dream Moving Adventure Blog

We slept until a little after 8:00am this morning and then relaxed and watched an episode of MONK that Eric had never seen, where John Tuturro plays his brother.  It’s hard to believe, but Ambrose Monk is even more neurotic than Adrian Monk!  It was a great episode and Eric and I really enjoyed it.

We had Cheerios for breakfast and then showered and dressed.  We did three loads of laundry and walked with the cart to KEIL’S to do a fast food shopping.  When we got back we put everything away and then I “steamed” 2 loads of the laundry, including about 5 pairs of Eric’s jeans, and then let the towels and linens dry in the dryer while we watched TV.

When the laundry was done we went to Pacific Beach to CAFÉ 976 for lunch.  I had a spinach burger with a salad on the side.  Eric had a chicken salad sandwich with a salad on the side.  It was a gorgeous afternoon and we ate outside.  Unfortunately, there were a lot of flies, which made it harder to enjoy our meal with all the hand-waving we had to do to keep them off our food.  You don’t see as many flies in San Diego, unless there’s food around.  In NY it seems there are flies everywhere – at least that’s how I remember it.

After lunch we went to COSTCO, but it was actually closed.  We were shocked!  I thought that place was open 7 days a week, holidays included.  I guess I was wrong!

Next, we went to the local theatre in the shopping center to see if there was a movie starting soon, but there wasn’t anything for a few hours, so we decided to check out the theatre in Hillcrest, which we had never been to before.  We found a spot right around the corner and walked there, but – unfortunately – we never heard of any of the movies playing there!  I guess it’s arty or independent films.  Since we didn’t know what they were about, we just kept walking.

We walked around Hillcrest, going in and out of stores.  We shopped at BABETTE SCHWARTZ, my favorite card store, and did some window shopping.  Read all about the real Babette Schwartz: http://babette.com/meet_babette_schwartz.

Next, we got back in the car and drove to Little Italy for gelato at our new favorite place – Papplecco.  I had a medium-size cup with ½ Nutella (my new obsession) and ½ Mocha.  Eric had ½ Stratiatella and ½ Nutella.

We sat outside and along came these two magnificent greyhounds.  A guy and girl were walking them.  She went in to order gelato and he stayed outside and we got to pet the dogs.  They were so sweet and friendly – such beautiful animals.  They were both rescued from a racecourse in Mexico!

After our gelato we drove home.  There was another episode of MONK on that Eric had never seen and – coincidentally – it also included John Tuturro returning as Monk’s brother.  It was a Halloween episode and it was really sweet.  The funny thing is, Tony Shalhoub (who plays MONK) really has a brother, who looks a lot like him.  He had a small part in one episode, so he’s obviously an actor.  You’d think he’d be able to get his real-life brother to play his brother on the show, but no such luck!

Anyway, I fell asleep and Eric came out to the living room to watch TV.  I woke up at 8:00pm and started answering emails and blogging.  Believe it or not, we have a lot of interest in the RV!  Everyone wants to give us a deposit.  They’re all anxious to buy it!  Meanwhile, we keep telling them all that we can’t take any deposits, and don’t even want to show it anymore, until we get the title cleared up.  There’s someone in Santa Barbara, and someone in Houston, who wants to come see it.  We only listed it on CRAIGSLIST in San Diego, but I guess people look all over!

The ad only runs for 7 days and I think we listed it last Monday or Tuesday, so it should be ending soon and we’re not going to run it again until the title is cleared.  Eric’s going to work on getting all that resolved and will then show the RV and we hope to sell it and have it GONE before he leaves for New York at the end of September.

It’s going to be a nice, short week – only working 4 days!  I love Mondays off!

Isn’t the first day back after a long weekend always a killer?  Today was no exception!  It wasn’t stressful, because there wasn’t a big project with a deadline, but there was just SO much work, because we were out of the office for 3½ days.  I had SO many emails to go through in the morning and a few projects to work on.

I tried out my coffee-for-one this morning, which my darling friend, Peppy, sent me.  It came out great!  I was impressed by how easy it was and what a great cup of coffee I had!  I had purchased STARBUCKS decaf at KEIL'S (what else) and it worked just great!  I'm set now!

When I got down to HR there were over 70 resumes that needed to be printed and processed.  As I got through more and more, they kept coming in.  I processed over 50 and still had a lot left when I left at 5:00pm.

I’m still working through lunch, even though they told me I have to take ½ hour.  I’ve just got too much to do!  Some of the girls in HR brought in magazines, so I’d have something to do while I take my ½ hour (which I’m not taking), so we all started bringing in magazines once we’ve read them.  One girl gets GLAMOUR.  I get COSMO, and MARTHA STEWART LIVING.  Another girl gets a lot of travel mags (which don’t interest me at all), but she also gets US and O (Oprah’s mag), which I love.  So, we’re all trading mags, but I just bring them home to read while I’m relaxing.  I just can’t take lunch unless I’m going somewhere and doing something.

I had an appointment at 6:00pm today to get my hair cut and colored and I was SO happy, because my roots were really long and it REALLY bothers me a lot when it gets this bad.  It always seems to happen overnight.  One day they don’t look bad at all, and the next day they’re HORRIBLE.  They turned horrible last Thursday and I tried to get an appointment over the weekend, but he wasn’t going to be in until today, so I had to wait.

Unfortunately, as I was driving to Hillcrest for my 6:00pm appointment, I listened to my messages and heard that my appointment was cancelled!  I called in and they said I could come tomorrow at 6:00pm.  So, now, I have to go through one more day looking like this!  It ain’t easy, I’ll tell you that!

Instead of getting my hair done, I had some chips and hummus, watched Dr. Phil and then took a nap.  Very productive!

When I woke up, Eric had dinner all ready – Mahi Mahi and a great salad.  Eric’s so cute, he says he doesn’t understand why, but my salads always taste better than his.  I think he’s right, and I don’t even know why, but I’ll never tell him!  I really appreciate when he cooks for me, because it’s so nice to relax when you get home after a long day at work.

After dinner we watched AMERICA’S GOT TALENT and then I cleaned out Conrad’s cage while Eric held him on his finger.  I really think he likes Eric better than me, but Eric says he “tolerates” him.  He seems perfectly happy to sit on Eric’s finger while I vacuum and wash out his whole cage, put fresh paper on the bottom, refill his water and food dishes and put it all back together again.

After that was done, we had WEIGHT WATCHER’S and HEALTHY CHOICE ice cream and fudge pops and watched more AMERICA’S GOT TALENT.  All the new shows start within the next couple of weeks, but right now there’s not much to watch on TV!

I’m not looking forward to walking around another day with these horrible roots showing in my hair, but I guess I have no choice (unless I wear a hat!).  Oh, well.  As Tim Gun says on PROJECT RUNWAY – Make it Work!

Ahhhh!  No more roots!  At least for a month!  My mother, who has been dying her hair blonde for over 40 years, always said “You’re a slave to it.”  Boy, was she right!  When you gotta go, you gotta go!  I feel SO much better right now.  Not only are the dark roots gone, but he trimmed it a lot, too, so it’s lighter and not as bushy, which is a relief.

I told him I really want to cut it all off, but my face is too fat now, so when I lose 15 pounds I’m doing it.  He said, “Okay!  You lose the weight and I’ll cut it all off!”  So, now I have an even greater motivation.  I do really want to look great for Jessica’s wedding in November, and I certainly have enough party dresses, if I can just fit into one of them!

I am determined to get back down to a more normal weight for my age and height.  I know I’ll never be 100 pounds again, but I don’t have to be 130 either!

So, the woman I work with didn’t show up this morning until almost 10:00am, which means I did pretty much nuthin’ until she came in.  Then, I did a couple of projects for her, but it was really slow.  It was frustrating, because it’s SO busy in HR and I knew I had at least 50 resumes waiting for me to print and process, so I would MUCH rather have spent the morning in HR, but what can you do?

I was invited to a wedding shower of a beautiful Chinese girl I know at work.  It was today from 2:00pm – 4:00pm.  I certainly would not have stayed for two hours, but I planned to make an appearance – except I completely forgot about it!

I was so busy in HR (and we were having so much fun) that it just slipped my mind.  Next thing I knew, one of the people sent pictures from the shower.  Oh, well. 

One of the girls in HR got engaged and I’m so happy for her.  She’s adorable and her fiance works for the firm, too!   In fact, I knew him before I knew her!  They make a beautiful couple.  Her ring is gorgeous and everyone was so happy for her!  That’s the third engagement at work and I work with every person!  My “morning boss” got engaged last month, the woman I trained for the job I worked at for 5 months just got engaged, and now one of the girls in HR got engaged.  Love is in the air – and it’s right around ME!

When Elsa dropped me off I just jumped in the car and drove to Hillcrest.  John cut and colored my hair and I got home at 7:30pm.  Eric and I just turned around and went out.  We walked over to MOUNTAIN MIKE’S PIZZA for dinner.  I got the pizza/salad bar combo and Eric got a chicken cutlet parmesan hero.  We had a fast dinner and came back to the apartment.  I jumped in the shower to get all the hair off me (I hate the way I feel after a haircut) and then started working on the computer.

We’re still working on resolving the title issue and we’re still getting a lot of interest in the RV!  According to the NY DMV website, you can actually sell a vehicle with a lien on the title, as long as you give the person buying it the original lien release.  So, we don’t REALLY need to get a clean title, if we don’t want to.  I just need to find out if the fact that we’re selling in California could complicate matters.  If not, then we can sell, give them the title and the lien release and that will be the end of that.

If we DO send the lien release and title back to NY, we’ll have to wait weeks for the clean title to come.  I’d really like to avoid that, if we can.  We’ll just have to see.  I’m calling NY DMV tomorrow to ask about a California sale.

Eric and I watched AMERICA’S GOT TALENT in the living room while I recorded PROJECT RUNWAY and AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL on the DVR in the bedroom.  The Fall season is starting and all my shows are coming back!  I’m not going to know what to watch first!

It was so busy day at work today.  It was also a sad day.  My friend at work lost his sister.  She’s been ill for about a year and she passed yesterday.  It’s so sad.  He’s only 40 and his sister was only 46.  It makes you put things in perspective.  My troubles seem slight and unimportant when you think of someone losing a sibling.  I love my two sisters, Audrey and Lenae, so much and I can’t imagine my life without them.

Things were tense in the department, because everyone knew about his loss.  He left to go back East where his family lives and will be gone for a week.  So very sad.

I had a nice afternoon in HR.  SO busy – as usual – but it’s a good busy.  Eric picked me up at 4:45pm and we had our regular Thursday appointment.  All went well and I always feel better after our sessions.

We decided to go back to CITY WOK in MISSION HILLS for dinner.  We had been there with our friends, Marianne and Allan, and we really enjoyed the food.  We shared a big bowl of Hot & Sour Soup and then had a dish called Spicy Chile Shrimp and String Beans.  It was SO delicious.  The shrimp and string beans were stir fried with this spicy sauce that was different from anything I’ve ever tasted.  We had a lot left over (the portions are huge) and we’ll have it for dinner tomorrow night!

When we got home we worked on the RV situation.  We’re getting close to a resolution and I’ll let you all know when it’s a done deal!

We wanted to watch KITCHEN NIGHTMARES but the stupid Republican Convention was on and stupid McCain was speaking, so the show was delayed for ½ hour.   I just don’t have the patience for any of it.  My mother, on the other hand, told me she’s been watching every minute and was going to watch tonight, but she promised to remain a staunch democrat!  She better!

Tomorrow’s Friday already.  This week really did fly by.  We have no plans for the weekend, but that’s okay.  We have lots to do around the apartment.  Eric is packing his things to be shipped to NY.  Yes, he’s really going back.  It makes me so sad to think of him leaving again, but I know he’ll never be happy here and he thinks his chances are much better in NY.

We have to make the most of our time left together, because we won’t see each other again until I fly to NY at Thanksgiving for Jessica’s wedding.  It’s only two months, but it will seem like a lifetime, I’m sure.

In the meantime, I know all our NY friends will make the time to call or see Eric and let him know how much he’s loved.  He knows it, but I know seeing and hearing from his friends will mean a lot to him.

Eric and I have been through a lot this past year, but the love and support of our family and friends has kept us going, given us comfort and warmed our hearts.  For that we are eternally grateful!

One of the girls in HR was celebrating a birthday and, as usual, we had a party.  She requested IN & OUT BURGER, so two of the girls went and picked up lunch for everyone.  They only have burgers at IN & OUT BURGER, but they actually had grilled cheese, so I got that and french fries (not diet food, I know).  The funny thing is, one of the girls told me it’s not really grilled cheese, it’s exactly like a cheeseburger, with the bun, lettuce, tomato, pickles, and cheese, but there’s no burger.  She ordered the same thing as me.

That sounded great to me, and hers was just like that, but mine was just a bun with some cheese melted inbetween.  It wasn’t grilled either.  It looked like it was put in a microwave to melt the cheese.  PLUS, by the time they got it back to the office it was cold.  We all laughed and discussed the mystery of why one of the girls had the full sandwich with everything on it, and mine was just plain cheese and a bun.  The girls who placed the order ordered two grilled cheeses.  The only thing we could figure out is that two different people made them!

They felt bad and kept asking me how it was, and I didn’t want them to feel bad (especially since one of the girls was treating me), so I ate it and said it was good.  At least the french fries were great!

We laughed a lot (as always) and everyone went around the table and told what they were doing this weekend, which started lots more conversations.  I told the girls that I had never met such a great group of girls who support each other, work so well together, laugh so much, and are such a great team.  They were all pleased to hear it.

We finished with a delicious sheet cake with a tropical theme.  I had a small piece, but I could have eaten half the cake.  One of the girls’ friends made it and it was SO good!

So, here’s the latest scoop on the RV.  We have been told that if you have the original title and the original lien release letter, you can sell it with a lien on it.  We don’t really have a lien on the RV, but the DMV in NY messed up and issued us a new title with the old lien from the previous owners.  We thought we’d have to get a new title, which takes weeks, but now we do not think we need to.

The old owners talked to the bank and the bank was supposed to send a new original lien release letter to their branch in San Diego.  Eric’s been calling that branch every day, asking about the letter, but it didn’t arrive.  Then, today, the old owners (and they ARE old) called to say the letter was sent to THEM instead of the bank here, so now THEY have to send it to US and WE will mail it to the buyer.

Meanwhile, the buyer was coming today.  He said he was willing to pay cash and take the RV with the signed title and the copy of the lien release and we’d mail him the original when we got it.  Made sense.  Sounded good.  Unfortunately, he couldn’t get a ride here today, so he’s supposed to come tomorrow.  I copied a BILL OF SALE from the internet and that, combined with a copy of the signed title, is all the documentation we will need.

We already took off the plates and I will surrender them by mail on Monday, if the RV goes tomorrow (and we REALLY hope it does!).

When I got home from work I took a nap.  I really needed it.  When I woke up, I worked on the computer and we had corn dogs.  Then, we watched the new episode of MONK – his 100th episode!  It was really great, and they brought back a lot of characters from past episodes.  We really enjoyed it (as usual!).  I can’t recommend this show enough.  It’s funny, sweet, and has really great writing and wonderful actors.

I wrote about our niece, Melissa, weeks ago, because she was ill, is still not well.  She will be having an operation next Wednesday.  It turns out that the problem relates to an accident she had when she was 12.  Her liver was badly damaged and they repaired it.  Apparently, there is a problem with the repair (after 20 years) and now they have to operate to fix it.  My poor, darling, sweet, Melissa.  She has been through SO much these last 3 months.  Can you imagine not being well and suffering from horrible symptoms for 3 months and they can’t help you?

Finally, they know what needs to be done and they’re going to do it.  They DID diagnose her problem immediately when she was in the hospital in July, but they weren’t able to figure out what to do about it until now.  Such a terrible, frustrating situation.  I wish I was there with her in NY, but Eric will be there soon enough and he will visit her and let her know how much she is loved and missed by both of us.

We have no plans for the weekend, except I see a big celebration in our future if the RV sells tomorrow.  Dinner and a movie?  Maybe a trip to Pappalecco in Little Italy for some gelato.  Who knows?  I just know we’ll be happy and more lighthearted when that RV is out of the parking lot (and the PT is in!)

I managed to sleep until almost 9:00am.  It’s a miracle!  Okay, I didn’t turn off the TV until 1:00pm, but it’s still 8 hours!

Unfortunately, Eric had a bad night.  He has one of his neckache/headaches and it’s really bad.  It’s definitely stress, but what can you do?  Knowing what causes it doesn’t stop it from happening, or make it go away.

The guy who wants the RV was supposed to call this morning and let us know when he was leaving and when he would get here.  At 10:30am he still had not called.  Meanwhile, I called the woman who sold us the RV and asked her to send us the Lien Release letter via UPS or FED EX, so we might know exactly when it will arrive.  If she sends it registered mail, you have to sit at home to sign for it, but you don’t know when it will arrive – it could be anytime, morning or afternoon.

We would like to avoid having Eric sit in the apartment for days, waiting for this thing to arrive, so if they send it via UPS or FED EX you usually get a date and an approximate time of delivery (although we’ve had problems with that, too  -- it’s all in the blog – Labor Day weekend in Chicago – DHL!).

It’s a good thing we had no plans for this weekend, because we have to play it by ear until Eric feels better and the guy calls.  I’m almost hoping he doesn’t call, because I’d much rather sell the RV with the original Lien Release letter in hand and sell it to someone who lives a bit closer to us.  This is really complicating matters.

I spoke to my niece, Melissa, this morning.  She will be going into the hospital next Wednesday and will probably be released after 24 hours.  They’ll operate in the morning, monitor her overnight and let her go home on Thursday.  I’m so happy for her, because she will finally be on the road to recovery.  She has been through so much and it’s just horrible all the symptoms she’s had to suffer with – a fever for 3 months?  Itching?  It’s like a test of endurance, strength and persistence and she is a master.  She was taking kick-boxing classes!  Anyway, our thoughts and prayers are with her for a super-speedy recovery, so her life can finally get back to normal!

So, Eric and I hung around the apartment until a little after noon and then we said, “The hell with it!” and we decided to go out to lunch and to the movies to see HAMLET 2.  We were about to leave when the phone rang.  It was the guy and he said he was coming down to San Diego.  Eric said we were going out and that we wouldn’t be back in the apartment until 5:30pm.  He said he’d plan it so that he got there after 5:30pm.

We went out and drove to HILLCREST to find a place to eat.  We ended up at BRIAN’S AMERICAN EATERY, which is a diner our friends Marianne and Allan told us about.  It’s on Washington, off Cleveland (two of our presidents!).  It has a total 50s diner style with lots of booths and a fun 50s décor. 

Eric got a BLT, which came with onion rings and I got a veggie melt.  It came with two sides and Eric wanted macaroni and cheese and french fries.  They really didn’t have many healthy choices, but this was REALLY heavy on the carbs!  I mostly just ate my sandwich, which was really good, but I did try the fries and mac & cheese, which were great, too.  Eric had a vanilla malted, but I just had an iced tea. 

We asked if they had any t-shirts or mugs, or any souvenirs, because we have a good friend in NY named Brian, and a brother-in-law, too, but they said they didn’t have anything.  Boo hoo!  It would have been so cool to mail Brian a t-shirt with his name on it!  I noticed that the employees didn’t even have the restaurant name on their shirts.  They all just wore black polo shirts!

After lunch we drove up Washington a few miles to see where we’d end up, and then took the 805 back to Balboa and Clairemont Drive, which is right near the shopping center where the movie theatre is. 

We stopped at STARBUCKS (of course) and then went to see HAMLET 2.  It was really funny. 

I was surprised to learn that one of the leads (a high school theatre nerd) was in the original cast of SPRING AWAKENING on Broadway, which means Eric and I saw him perform!  Wow!  He was so cute and funny in this movie.

After the movie we headed back to the apartment.  I was thrilled to find that the check we were expecting from the union actually arrived.  Now, if my paycheck comes on Monday I’ll be feeling a LOT better about our mail delivery!

Eric still had a bad headache, so he decided to take a nap and I decided to join him.  When we woke up it was 8:00pm and we hadn’t heard from RV guy.  Then the phone rang and it was him.  He said he couldn’t come today and would come tomorrow.  This is the fourth time he’s said he was coming and didn’t show.  First, he was supposed to come Friday morning, but he didn’t make it.  Then, he was supposed to come Friday night, but he didn’t make it.

Now, he was supposed to come this morning, but he didn’t make it, and then he told us he’d come tonight, and he didn’t make it.  The truth is, I’m not worried about it, because we still don’t have the original Lien Release document (more on that in a minute), and I’d much rather hand the buyer the original document and the title when we sell, plus the fact that there are lots of other buyers interested, so I’m really not stressing.  It’s just a pain in the ass to get your hopes up so many times and then have them dashed.

So, I called and asked the seller in NY to please FED EX the document to us instead of mailing, so we would get it ASAP.  She agreed and it was sent out this afternoon and should be here on Monday morning.  I have a tracking number, so I can track the package.  It cost almost $40!!!!

Eric was so surprised it was so expensive, but I know when you send things overnight, and on the weekend, it’s more expensive.  I thought the woman would tell me to forget the money, because it’s really THEIR fault that we’re going through all this – and it’s absolutely no fault of our own – but of course she told me exactly how much and I told her I’d send a check.  I’ll tell you one thing – I’m not sending the check until the document has arrived safely and until the RV is sold.

After we knew that the RV guy wasn’t coming, I decided to do a load of laundry with all my work clothes.  Eric carried everything down for me and then comes when I’m done “steaming” he carries it all back, so we can hang it on the line together.

As I’m typing this, Eric is watching TV in the bedroom and I can hear Conrad tweeting.  He’s not really singing.  He just tweets every few minutes.  It’s like he’s trying to get Eric’s attention, I swear.  I really think he’s bonded with Eric a lot more than me, but that’s probably because Eric’s home so much more.

I hear Eric whistling back, and making noises, and then sometimes I hear him say, “What birdie?  What Conrad?” as if Conrad is talking to him and he really wants to understand.  How cute is that?  Then, I heard him say, “Birdie” but kind of in a baby talk.  It’s the cutest thing.  Eric is so sweet with animals.  That’s something I always loved about him.  He can’t pass a dog on the street without petting it.  He always loved the stray cats we’d rescue, and would really get attached to them.  When we first started dating, he loved my parakeet, Duke, too.  You always know if a guy is sweet with animals, he’s got a good heart.

We have no plans for tomorrow, but I need to go food shopping.  We’ll probably go have brunch someplace.  The good thing about cell phones is that we don’t have to wait around for this guy to call.  We can go about our business.  Remember the days when you sat at home waiting for a call?  Remember before there were even answering machines?

I can remember in the early 80s sitting in my apartment waiting for a guy to call for a date and being afraid to even go to the bathroom, because this was also before cordless phones and I would have to RUN from the bathroom to the living room where the phone was.  OMG!  I can remember answering the phone and if it wasn’t who I was waiting for I’d say, “I can’t talk now!” and hang up and then worry for the next hour that he tried during the 5 seconds I was on the phone and got a busy signal.  How neurotic was I?

Do you know that in the 70s and early 80s, when I went on auditions, I paid for a service that would answer the phone and take messages and then you’d call the service and say, “Are there any messages for me?”  Can you imagine?  These businesses all went bust when the answering machine was invented.  Now, there aren’t even many answering machines sold anymore (if at all), because phone companies all have the voice mail service.  Only my parents in Florida still have a regular answering machine.  Does anyone else reading this have a regular answering machine?  We don’t even have a landline anymore.  Just our two cell phones.  Who needs it?

Well, I’m going to watch TV with Eric.  There’s not much on, so maybe we’ll rent a movie!  Before I close, I want to say HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to our darling friend, Ted!

We did watch a movie last night – JUNO, which we had never seen.  What a sweet movie.  We both really enjoyed it.  We love that Michael Cera, who was so amazing in SUPERBAD.  He’s now in some NICK & NORA movie (we’ve seen the trailer several times) and it co-stars one of the girls from HOUSE BUNNY who also played the teenage daugher in THE 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN.  She’s great, too!

This morning we woke up and just relaxed around the apartment.  We watched VIVA LAS VEGAS on TMC and we both really enjoyed it.  It's great to watch movies on TMC, because they're uncut and there are no commercials.  VIA LAS VEGAS is my all-time favorite Elvis movie, and I adore Ann-Margret, so the fact that she’s in it has a lot to do with it.  I actually sang a song from that movie in one of my cabaret acts – MY RIVAL IS A BABYBLUE RACING CAR!  What a great movie!

The RV guy was supposed to call at noon, but when I left to go food shopping at 1:00pm, he still hadn’t called.  Eric had said he would go shopping with me, but he wasn’t feeling great, so I just told him I’d go and walked there myself with my cart. 

As I was checking out he called and said he had walked over and as I hung up the phone he appeared!  He didn’t want me to have to carry the stuff up the stairs.  It’s not so bad in the cart – much better than carrying all the packages from the car!  Anyway, it was so sweet of him and we walked back together.  I really appreciated it.

He carried the cart up the stairs and helped me put everything away.  Then, as we were watching UNDER THE YUM YUM TREE, the RV guy called and said he was on his way and should be here by 4:30pm.  I told him that I thought he was stringing us along and that if he didn’t show up today we were accepting another offer.  He said he was just trying to get someone to drive him down and that he was sincere and he had every intention of buying the vehicle. 

RV guy told us he would be leaving at 2:30pm.  At 3:30pm the phone rang.  It was his friend, explaining that he couldn’t bring cash and could only get a cashier’s check.  He explained to us that he was the one lending RV guy the money.  Why RV guy didn't call us himself, I'll never know.  Maybe he knows he's driving us crazy.

We had told RV guy that we would only accept cash.  I told his friend that we were really getting tired of all this.  He said the guy was really an honest guy, and had every intention of buying the vehicle, but I told him we wouldn’t accept anything but cash and to come tomorrow, when Eric would probably have the original Lien Release letter in his hand.  It made sense to this guy, so he said Eric should call the RV guy when he got the UPS delivery.

So, now, he’s supposed to come tomorrow.  We’ll see.  This is getting crazier by the day.  At least we should have the letter tomorrow or Tuesday.  She sent it UPS and I have the tracking number.   If this guy doesn't come, I will be ready to contact all the other interested parties.  I had told them all that we weren't willing to sell until we had the Lien Release letter, so if he doesn't come tomorrow I'll be emailing all of them tomorrow night.

I made us a delicious dinner of things I bought today at KEIL’S.  First, I sauteed mushrooms, minced garlic and fresh chopped cilantro, and then I added scallops.  When they were almost fully cooked, I put it all in the toaster oven with some bread crumbs on top (Eric LOVES bread crumbs!).  We had it with a salad.  It came out really good.  I squeezed a lot of lemon on the scallops, and the lemon really added a lot.  I LOVE lemon!

There’s absolutely nothing on TV, except the MTV VIDEO MUSIC AWARDS, which I like to record, so I can fast forward through anything boring and just watch the music acts I like.  We watched an hour of it, and I did enjoy seeing some of the acts, but Eric and I can't believe how many music acts we've never even heard of.  We felt very out of it.

I’m nervous about tomorrow.  Will the UPS guy show up with the Lien Release?  Will the RV guy show up with the cash?  We’ll just have to wait and see.  I’ll tell you what, with Eric packing (his stuff is being picked up Wednesday to ship to NY), waiting for the UPS delivery, and wondering if this guy is going to flake AGAIN, it’ll be a miracle if either of us gets any sleep tonight.  We’re both so stressed right now.  Unbelievably stressed.

We had a nice, quiet weekend.  We didn’t do much, but we were kind of hanging around waiting for RV guy and didn’t want to make any big plans.  Now, the weekend is over and we only have one more weekend left before Eric goes back to NY next Tuesday, September 16th.

I really want to make the best of our last week together.  I want to make it memorable, and fun.  I keep trying to make sure he knows how much I love him.  I keep telling him everything’s going to be okay, and that we will be fine, but I think both of us have to believe it to really make it happen.  Deep down he knows all this, but he’s just having such a hard time seeing anything in a positive light.  This depression really has him down.

It’s going to take all his strength to fight this thing.  I just hope he can do it, because I can only help so much – especially once he’s on the East Coast.  His sisters will support in him in any way they can, I know that.  He has a lot of friends and family who love him.  But, ultimately, this is something Eric has to do for himself.  He has to fight, and he has to win this battle.

Did you ever have one of those days?  I dragged myself out of bed this morning.  I didn’t sleep well, even though I took one of my over-the-counter sleeping pills.  Eric doesn’t even bother taking them, because he says they don’t help.  He doesn’t sleep much at all.

I had a pretty uneventful morning at work.  I checked the UPS tracking number for the letter and saw that it was delivered at 8:50am and signed for by “Eric.”  I couldn’t believe how fast the information was available online.  It wasn’t even 10:00am!   I called Eric.  He sounded terrible.  He said he called the RV guy and told him to be here at 5:30pm.  He wanted me to be here, so I could take care of all the signing and copying.  He just didn’t feel up to handling it all himself.

I asked him for the guy’s number, because I wanted to make sure he wasn’t going to flake out again.  I called him and he answered.  I spoke from the heart.  I told him that Eric wasn’t well and that was part of the reason why we were selling the RV.  I didn’t go into any detail, but I told him that I needed confirmation from him that he was really coming tonight, with cash, and would be there at 5:30pm.  He assured me that he would.  He was very sweet and said he felt bad and didn’t realize we were having troubles.

I told him it would be fine, as long as he was there at 5:30pm with the cash and ready to take the RV.  I explained about the Bill of Sale, the Lien Release and the Title and told him we’d each get signed copies.  He said that was great.

I felt a little better, because the letter had arrived, but I was still very worried about this guy.  I just couldn’t believe after all this time that he was finally going to show.  The truth is, he DID show up the first time he said he’d come – when he came to look at the vehicle, and Eric said he seemed like a nice guy, but I was still worried.

I worked really hard in HR all afternoon.  I had 83 resumes to print and process.  I only got through about 30.  It’s just a very slow process and I can’t get ahead, because they keep coming in and I’m only there 4 hours a day.

I asked Elsa to leave a few minutes early, so I could get home in time to get all the papers together.  I am happy to report that my paycheck was in the mail today, and Eric got his check from the union the other day, so whatever the problem was with our mail last week, it looks like it’s okay – at least this week!

I got everything in order and was going through my mail when Eric’s phone rang.  I figured it was RV guy, letting us know he was outside.  Unfortunately, it was some other guy, calling for RV guy.  He spoke to Eric for a few minutes, and Eric seemed confused and was making faces, like the guy was saying something weird.  I said, “Give me the phone.”  He was happy to hand it to me.  I said hello and asked who it was.

He proceeded to introduce himself and tell me that he was the guy who was really buying the RV.  RV guy was buying it from us and, I guess, selling it to this guy.  He said that RV guy asked him to deal with us directly.  He started giving me some story about how he wanted the RV, but he couldn’t come until Wednesday – and he’d be bringing a cashier’s check.

I told him quickly, and in no uncertain terms, that the deal was off.  I said we were selling to RV guy – not to him – and that RV guy had strung us along and flaked out too many times.  The deal was off!  I told him that there was someone in our apartment complex who was interested in the RV and that we were going to sell it to him.

I told him I was very sorry and hung up very quickly.  A few minutes later the phone rang.  It was RV guy.  I said, “Listen.  I spoke to you today.  You promised me that you’d be here with the cash at 5:30pm.  I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing, but we’re no longer interested in selling to you.  You delayed this day after day after day and we’re selling to someone else."  Again, I said I was very sorry, and hung up quickly.

He called back.  I told him that we were not interested in talking to him and not to call anymore.  I didn’t yell.  I was polite, but firm.

He called back.  He begged me to listen.  He told me he was leaving right now and was bringing the cash.  Is this man crazy?  Why do we get the loonies?  I’m asking you!  I just said, “Sorry,” and hung up.

After that, when he called back, I just opened the phone and closed it again, so he couldn’t even get Eric’s voicemail.  He finally stopped.

A few minutes later the phone rang.  It was RV guy’s son, who had come down to see the RV with his father.  Eric answered and said we couldn’t talk to them anymore and hung up.

A few minutes later the phone rang.  We didn’t know the number so I answered.  It was a guy who said he was interested in the RV.  Coincidentally, he called 5 minutes after this whole thing happened – a week after the ad closed (it was only up for 7 days).  He claimed he emailed me last week, but never heard back.  I asked him his name.  I saved every single email I got in reference to the RV ad on CRAIGS LIST and he never emailed me.  I had a feeling it was a friend of RV guy, calling to see what I’d say about the RV, because I told RV guy that we had another buyer.

I told him the RV was no longer available.  I apologized and hung up.  A few minutes later Lee called again.  Now, I knew I was right.  That was no buyer – it was just a friend of RV guy. 

I’m a little nervous, because this guy knows where we live, but he doesn’t know which apartment we live in and our name isn’t on the mailbox or anything.  Also, his son lives 2 hours away in Ontario, California, and he actually lives in Seattle (at least that's what he told Eric!).  I guess we’ll never know what he was up to, and what he was trying to pull, but it was just our bad luck that the first guy who called was an idiot. 

I immediately emailed 5 other people who had responded to our ad.  I just have to pray that one of them wants the RV and we can sell it before the 16th, when Eric leaves.  As long as they see it and talk to Eric, I can handle the sale (it’s actually in my name).  I just wouldn’t be able to show it, because I don’t know much about it at all.  That’s Eric’s department.

Anyway, as you can imagine, we were both pretty upset by this whole incident.  I tried to make Eric feel better, but it wasn’t easy.  I told him my friend had his sister’s funeral today and that I’d rather be dealing with RV crap than burying a relative.  He knows it’s true, and I could see it sink in that this really wasn’t that bad.

I told him I’d take the RV, drive down to Mission Bay and push the thing into the bay before I’d let it upset me.  I told him that he’s all that matters, and that I’d lose everything in a fire, or theft, or hurricane, or tornado, and it wouldn’t matter – as long as I had him.

I think that made him feel better.  To make ME feel better, he made me my favorite comfort food – grilled cheese.  He makes really good grilled cheese and it was delicious!  He makes it very buttery (although we use the “fake” butter that’s supposed to actually be good for you!)

We watched junk TV – Deal or No Deal, Two ½ Men, Family Guy, etc.  PRISON BREAK is on, but I haven’t watched the first 2-hour episode yet, and Eric’s not interested in that show (I love it, but he doesn’t like it!). 

So, we’re back to square one with the RV.  The only good news is that we have the proper documentation for the Lien Release, so there should be no problem with that – although our lives seem to be revolving around “Murphy’s Law” these days.  Anything that can possibly go wrong will go wrong.

Eric’s been fine all night.  He’s always better at night when I’m here with him.  He says over and over that I’m the only thing that keeps him going.  The days here are very hard for him, because he’s pretty much stuck in the apartment and he’s all by himself. 

I told him that worries me, because what’s going to happen when I’m here and he’s in NY?  I told him I’ll still be here for him, but that HE has to keep him going.  I told him that we can talk on the phone, but he has to be able to get out of bed and do things when I’m not around.  It’s really hard for him.  He has to push himself to do anything during the day.  When I’m home he just perks up.

I am hoping that his sister will be able to motivate him.  She said he’s going to have to look for work, and she has a list of things that need to be done around the house.  I told her she has to keep him busy with work and errands, because he actually likes to keep busy, and that she should get him to do things for her, because she can use the help.

The shipping company is picking up Eric’s things on Wednesday and then he’ll be hanging around with nothing much until next Tuesday, when he flies to NY.  I know this last week is going to be very hard on him, because he’s really not going to have anything to do.  He packed his last bicycle today, so he can’t even ride (not that he does that much anyway these days).

This is definitely the hardest thing we’ve ever been through.  I’m trying to stay optimistic, positive, and keep the faith, but it’s so hard.  I feel like I have to do it for the both of us.  It’s a big job, but I still think I’m up for it!

I didn’t get a good night’s sleep.  I was very paranoid about crazy RV guy.  I was worried that he was going to drive down here and try to figure out which apartment we live in and try to get us to sell him the RV.  Fortunately, he only called once – and got Eric’s voicemail.  He left a 2-minute message, begging me to reconsider, and offering all kinds of weird explanations.  Most of it didn’t even make sense and was just rambling and disconnected thoughts.  Good times.

I had to fax the contract for the movers today and it’s all set for tomorrow at noon.  Eric has all his boxes in the dining room area, except for the bikes.  He’s all packed.  I look around and think “How did this happen?”  Really.  I’m asking.  How did a couple who has been happy together for 26 years (married for 24) and never broke up for even a day, never been apart for more than 2 weeks (and that was just recently on Eric’s first trip to NY) – how did it come to this?  I know we're not breaking up -- and I really want to reiterate that to the world -- we are more together than ever, this is just something Eric has to do -- but why do we have to be separated?

We’ll never know.  Why do bad things happen to good people?  I remember my mother reading that book many years ago – WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE.  I think it was when my father’s best friend was killed in a horrible car accident.  I think that may have been the beginning of my mother’s depression.  Yes, she suffers from it, too.  It’s funny, but when I tell people that Eric’s depressed, so many people tell me they suffer from it, and they’re on medication, and they manage to lead beautiful lives.  I just want Eric to be another one of those people who manages it and lives with it, and has a good life despite it.

Whenever I write in a card for a wedding, I always tell the bride and groom to cling to each other – literally and figuratively.  Cling to each other and never let go, because that is what keeps people together.  So many times when things get tough people turn away from each other.  It can mean the end of a marriage if people stop turning towards each other for comfort and love and turn away from each other out of frustration or anger.

Eric and I have been clinging to each other more than ever.  I know in the therapist’s terms we’re “co-dependent,”  but it just seems like love to me.  I want Eric to stand on his own two feet, but I never want him to forget – not even for one second – how much I love him and need him.  I want him to know that even though we will be far away from each other, we can still cling to each other. 

I was really busy at work in the morning and in the afternoon, but we did have a lot of fun in HR, too (as usual).  The girls there just love to talk and laugh and there’s always a new topic of conversation.  Today the subject of Halloween came up.  They decided it’s time to start thinking about it.  Apparently, the whole office dresses up for Halloween.  Did you ever?  HR always has a theme and all the girls get together and figure something out.  They have some ideas, and I’m just excited to get dressed up for Halloween.

I used to dress up when I had the shop, and I really enjoyed it.  Halloween was a big day in Peppy’s Dream.  I’d decorate the entire shop (naturally) and all the neighborhood kids would come trick-or-treating with their parents.  I’d take lots of pictures of them and I’d give a discount to any customers who came to the shop in costume.  It was always fun.

I really don’t know what I would do without this job.  It’s really keeping me sane, which is why I understand how Eric feels.  If I was home all day, without the stimulation of work, of contributing, of the great people, I think I’d have a nervous breakdown.

The girls in HR are so sweet.  I want to tell them what I’m going through, but I know I’ll cry, and they’ll feel sorry for me, and they look to me to make them laugh, to tell them stories, to be happy.  They have no idea.  Even Elsa, who I’m closer with than anyone, doesn’t know.  Every day I want to tell her, but I can’t bring myself to do it.  Last time Eric left, I didn’t tell her until he was gone.  One reason was I kept thinking he’d change his mind and not go.  It’s part of the reason this time, too, although I don't want him to change his mind.  I think this is the only thing left for him to do.  But I feel like if I talk about it something will go wrong.  I don’t want to jinx it.  I don’t want to make a kunahura, which is a Jewish jinx, for those of you who don’t already know!

Anyway, Eric and I are trying to enjoy every last day together, so tonight we drove to Pacific Beach for dinner.  I told him that I know I’m being bad, but I was really craving pasta.  We decided to go to Filippi’s Pizza Grotto on Garnet Avenue.  We sat down, but their menu was SO basic (spaghetti with marinara or meat sauce, or meatballs was their only choice), so we ended up at GRINGOS Mexican again, but I actually got a pasta dish there.

They had a Cilantro Lime Penne Pasta with vegetables.  It was really good.  Eric had a chicken burrito/taco combination.  I brought home most of my pasta, because of course I fill up on chips and salsa.  It was fun and the place is really nice.  We enjoy it there.

Tomorrow night we’re going to see a STEELY DAN tribute band called STEELY DAMNED.  Elsa had told me about them and I said that Eric would love them, because we LOVE Steely Dan and have seen them in concert.  I have their greatest hits 2-CD set and we always like to listen to it.  They’re playing at HUMPREY’S, a nice venue right by the water.  Elsa and Stephen are treating us, because we treated them when we went to THE WAVEHOUSE for brunch.

I’m really looking forward to it, but I’m nervous about how Eric will be feeling after all his stuff is carted off in a truck tomorrow afternoon.  I just hope he’s up for it, because I think it will be a great night out for us and a wonderful memory for him to have.

When we got home he organized and moved the boxes around and then we had ice cream (which we had purchased at KEIL’S).  Okay, so I’m definitely going to be fat, but I told Eric I will start my diet when he goes to NY and then when he sees me in November, when I come in for the wedding, I will be thin and gorgeous and he will love me more than ever.  He says he couldn’t love me more than he does now, but I’m still determined to lose 10 pounds in the next 2 months.   I plan to weigh less than 120 lbs. when I get on that plane!

I had a pretty quiet day at work.  Nothing too stressful.  I wasn’t too busy in the morning or afternoon.  I’ve kind of caught up on the resumes, but the weekends are when the most are sent, so Mondays and Tuesdays are always the hardest.

Most of my day was spent worrying about Eric.  The movers were coming at noon and I was just hoping everything was going well and that he was alright.  It turns out everything went very smoothly and when I spoke to him in the afternoon he sounded very quiet, but we were both looking forward to our night tonight with Elsa and Stephen.

When I got home it looked so strange.  Eric’s massage chair was gone, as well as all the boxes that had been in the dining room for weeks.  Also, most of the boxes are gone from the 2nd bedroom.  It’s practically empty.  Eric was in a pretty good mood.  I think he realizes this is really happening and, although he still wonders if he’s doing the right thing, at this point he knows he has to go.

I can’t believe we will only be together until next Tuesday.  I’m going to try to take Monday off, so we can have a nice three-day weekend together before I drive him to the airport on Tuesday morning.

It was so weird to be with Elsa and Stephen all night and not say anything, but I just feel it would bring the mood down, and complicate the evening.  We picked them up a little after 6:00pm and drove to Humphrey’s By The Bay, which is in Point Loma.

It’s a very small, intimate outdoor venue.  They had a huge buffet set up with tables and chairs all around.  Unfortunately, all the tables and chairs were taken, so we had to stand at a tall table to eat, and then sat on a low wall with a great view of the band.  They had such an unbelievable assortment of food.  When Elsa sent me the email, it said they had “complimentary hors d’oeuvres while they last.”  I had no idea what that meant, but I certainly wasn’t expecting much.

They had a huge table with all kinds of cheese, crackers, bread, fruit and pastries.  Then, they had stuffed mushrooms, breaded shrimp, a platter of poached salmon, mini tacos, chicken wings, fried wontons, pasta salad, chips and salsa, ribs, several other chicken dishes, and more!  We walked around filling our plates and then walked around some more!  Everything was really good.  We were all shocked and impressed by the amount, quality and diversity of food they had.

You also got a blue ticket when you came in for a free drink.  I had a melon martini, which was very sweet, but a little too strong for my taste.  Elsa and Stephen had wine and Eric had a seltzer.

The group playing is called STEELY DAMNED and they’re a STEELY DAN tribute band.  They played for at least an hour before taking a break and then played for a while more.  They played most of our favorites – REELIN’ IN THE YEARS (which I sang with my band), RICKY DON’T LOSE THAT NUMBER, and many others.  Eric and I love STEELY DAN and saw the actual band play at the BEACON a year or two ago.

We had a great time and really enjoyed ourselves.  The weather was perfect (as ususal), the ambiance was really pretty, right on the bay with tons of boats in the water, because the marina is right there.  It was very romantic, with tiny lights strung all around.  I have some pictures, but it’s too late for me to download and upload!

When Eric and I can have such a lovely night together, holding hands, laughing with friends, it seems impossible to me that he could be leaving, that he could be so unhappy here, yet he is.  I don’t know how he manages to perk up when we’re around other people, but he can do it.  Tomorrow he may be unable to get out of bed, but for tonight he was fine.  I guess that’s depression – you have your moments, but it doesn’t last.

Anyway, it was a beautiful night and I am so glad we have this memory of his last days in San Diego.  These last days will have to carry us for a few months, until we are together again in November.

The first thing my co-worker asked me this morning when I got to my desk was where I was seven years ago today.  I told her my story, and then she told me hers.  This will always be one of those days where people ask, “Where were you?” just like when Kennedy was assassinated.

Once we got off that subject, I told her I wanted to talk to her privately.  We went into the boss’ office (she’s still on sabbatical).  I told her that Eric is leaving on Tuesday and that I’d like Monday off.  She’s been very supportive, letting me make phone calls in the boss’ office, and I’ve told her that Eric is depressed and very unhappy here.  She suffers from depression and is on medication, so I know she understands.  Like I've said before, talk to people about depression and they’re either on medication themselves, or someone near and dear to them is suffering from it.  It’s rampant in the world these days, and it’s easy to understand why.

I’ll be the sale of anti-depressants in the world went up 25% after 9/11.  That was something that so many people – all over the world – just couldn’t come to terms with.  Forget about New York.  Half of New York was depressed or had anxiety after 9/11.

I had a pretty busy morning.  This afternoon was much calmer than usual.  Four of the girls were out today, for one reason or another, so it was pretty quiet in HR.  There weren’t that many resumes to go through (it peters out towards the end of the week and then gets crazy again on Monday and Tuesday).  I brought in my big leopard photo album with all the memorabilia and photos from my days in the band – THE AMBUSH!  We played from 1982 – 1984. 

Last night, when we were with Elsa and Stephen, the band came up, because they played REELIN’ IN THE YEARS, which I used to sing with the band.  I also sang DR. WU and Rizzo (the lead guitarist) sang HEY NINETEEN.  So, we did three STEELY DAN songs.  Elsa didn’t know I was in a band.  I had spoken about it to a few of the girls in HR, but I didn’t realize Elsa didn’t know.  I decided to show them all the album.  I knew they’d get a kick out of it – and they did.

They were laughing at all the 80s fashions, and they couldn’t believe how different I looked.  Oh, yes, those were the good old days, when my body was young and firm, my hair was dark brunette – naturally – and wrinkles were something I never even dreamed of.  It’s really amazing to grow old, to see how your face and body has changed, and to lament those changes and yearn for the good old days.  I can see why people have plastic surgery, because it’s not necessarily that you want to look different, you just want to look the way you used to.

If there are any young people out there reading this, I want to tell you to enjoy your youth.  When I was young I complained about my skin (I always had a lot of pimples), my hair (I always wanted straight, silky hair – not kinky curls), my lack of breasts (I was always flat-chested) and my white skin (I never tanned – just burned).  Now, I wish I had back my pimply-faced, frizzy-haired, flat-chested, pasty white body.  Really!  I never appreciated what I had when I had it and now that it’s gone, I realize I had it pretty good!

Meanwhile, I’m 50 and I still have pimples, frizzy hair and a pasty body.  The only thing that’s changed is I now have a bust, because I’ve gained so much weight!  And one out of four is NOT good enough!  I always say it’s so unfair, because I went from pimples to wrinkles without a day inbetween, but I’m STILL breaking out.  Is there no justice?

Back to today!  Eric picked me up at 4:45pm and we went to see our therapist.  This would be Eric’s last time before he leaves on Tuesday.  We talked a lot about a lot of things and it was very productive.  I really think she likes Eric a lot (who doesn’t?) and I know she is glad I’ll still be going to see her each week, so she can get an update on his progress.  It’s amazing how she knows just what to say to both of us.  She’s really a calming presence.  Wish she could move in with us!

When we left, Eric asked where I wanted to go to eat.  I still had a real craving for pasta, but I wanted Capellini – real Italian pasta – but in something other than plain marinara sauce.

We ended up in Little Italy at a place called LITTLE ITALY’S SPAGETTERIA.  I knew from the name that they’d have what I was looking for – and boy, did they ever!

The place was really big, with a brick oven for pizza in the front, a long bar with 4 or 5 TVs over it, each playing a different channel, and three separate eating areas – a beautiful patio in the front, where you can enjoy the busy streets of Little Italy as you eat, a smaller room, with a tiny red FIAT on the floor – a real car that’s about as big as the new SMART car, and a large back room we could barely see from our booth.

We shared a Ceasar salad, and then Eric had bowtie pasta with mushrooms and I had capellini with smoked salmon and a pink sauce.  Mama mia!  It was SO good.  They brought a basket of garlic bread to the table and we each had a couple of pieces.  It was fresh-baked and just melted in your mouth.  I think I made a sound like, Oh!  and Mmm!  after each bite!

Our waitress was so adorable.  She told us we better come back soon and we promised we would, but it made me so sad, because I knew we wouldn’t.  So sad.

When we left we went straight to Pappalecco, which is only a couple of blocks away, and we brought home gelato.  I’m eating it right now – as I type.  Eric got Stratiatella and Nutella and I got Mocha and Nutella.  They’re so darn good!  Just smack me if I complain about being fat!  I’m going to have to work extra hard to work off all the extra pounds I’m going to gain, but it was worth it tonight!

I know I said I’d download the pictures tonight, but I’m just too tired.  How about tomorrow?  Does that sound good?  I must go relax with Eric.  Goodnight!

This is my 400th Blog Entry.  Can you believe I've been doing this for 400 days?

I woke up at 4:15am this morning and made the mistake of looking at the clock.  Big mistake.  I knew I had almost 2 hours before the alarm went off, but I couldn’t fall back to sleep.  I tossed and turned for an hour and a half and then, when I only had about 20 minutes left, I finally dozed off and had the WEIRDEST dreams.  I mean weird.  I won’t go into it, but they were really strange.  Let’s just leave it at that!

So, I started off the day yawning and tired.  In the car going to work I told Elsa that Eric was leaving on Tuesday and I wanted to take Monday off.  She was so sweet.  When I told her Eric was going back to NY (again) she said, “Whyyyyyyyyy?”  Like that – like it made her very sad.  I explained that the last time he left he had the RV and that didn’t work out, and he came back thinking it would be better, but it wasn’t and now he’s going back without the RV and will be staying with his sister and I will follow when he’s settled.

She feels really bad, but she was very supportive.  I told her I will eventually tell people, but for now I want to keep it to a minimum, so she said she won’t say anything.

I had a pretty good morning.  I kept busy, but it wasn’t stressful.  At one point I said hi to one of the girls and she said, “What’s the matter?  You’re not your usual peppy self?”  The woman I work with (who knows Eric is leaving) looked at me and I just said, “I’m tired.  I didn’t sleep well last night.”  It’s funny how perceptive that woman is!

I had a nice, fun afternoon in HR.  It’s ALWAYS fun in HR.  I went down to the coffee cart with 3 of the girls at lunch and got my decaf vanilla mocha skim latte.  It’s delish!

Work was not too busy.  The resumes come in like crazy on Monday and Tuesday and then slow down so that by Friday it’s just a few, and I really can catch up on other things.  They have promised me that by the time Elsa and another girl go on sabbatical in October I will be in HR full time.  I CANNOT wait!

Today, the girl in HR who recently got engaged asked me if I would decoupage a box in which she can put all the memorabilia from their engagement.  I was so thrilled.  I told her I will need color copies of photographs and anything else she wants on there.  I’m so excited.  I need a project!  She’s going to give me the box and everything else and I’ll just supply the glue, varnish and labor!!!!  I’m sure she’ll offer to pay me, but I’ll tell her it’s an engagement gift.  I just love doing things like this, because I know she’ll cherish it forever!

At one point in the morning I made a big FOR SALE sign to put in the window of the RV.   When I got home tonight, we went out, put the sign on the RV (so it’s visible from the street) and then I went to get my eyebrows waxed.  She’s a little extreme and they’re so thin and sparse they’re practically not there, but I hate them bushy, too.  I can’t win!

After that we went to the movies and saw that BURN AFTER READING was playing at 8:10pm.  We bought two tickets and then went to Pacific Beach to HAIKU for dinner.  Eric was sentimental, because he knew it was his last time there and that was the first restaurant we ever went to in San Diego and we’ve eaten there more than any other restaurant in San Diego.  It’s “our” place.  We had a delicious meal of a Volcano Roll, a spicy tuna roll, a COMA (which is stuffed jalapeno peppers) and shumai.  All as good as ever!

The movie was really entertaining – surprising and funny.  I absolutely LOVE Brad Pitt and George Clooney – they’re two of my favorite contemporary actors – so I thoroughly enjoyed them, along with John Malkovich (who is AMAZING), Frances McDormand and Tilda Swinton.  It’s a great script, great cast, and we highly recommend it!

I was yawning all morning, all afternoon and all night, so I was anxious to get home.  We don’t have much planned for the weekend, but Eric has to finish packing and, inbetween, we’ll try to fit in as much fun as possible.

Eric’s attitude is not very positive so I have to admit there are moments when he says things that frustrate me and I say to myself, “He’s leaving and then you won’t have to hear it anymore.”  Sometimes I really look forward to it and I feel guilty about that, but it’s SO hard to live with someone who has such a bleak outlook.  It’s so contrary to everything I believe in and I just can’t deal with it after a while.

Even though I’ll miss him terribly, and will be very lonely, at least I’ll have some peace in my life.  There won’t be anyone to try to uplift, to support, to encourage, to help, to carry.  I may be alone, but at least I’ll have some peace.  I just hope Eric can find some peace in his life.

Tonight he made a statement that he doesn’t want to see our friends when he gets back to NY, because it won’t be the same without me.  I was SO frustrated by that statement, so furious, so angry.  How can he say that?  Doesn’t he know how important friends are when you’re depressed?  I didn’t say a thing.  I just looked away.  He said, “I made you mad, didn’t I?”  He KNOWS how his statements affect me.  It’s not like he doesn’t know what he’s saying.  He plans everything he says very carefully and says it purposely to get a reaction out of me.

I never realized it until our therapist pointed it out.  She says Eric goes fishing and I’m the fish.  He keeps throwing out the bait until I bite – and eventually I always did, but not anymore.  I just smiled and said, “You know best.  If that’s what you want to do, you can do that, but please bear in mind that I’m going to be doing a lot of socializing while you’re gone.  I’m not going to sit at home alone all weekend long.  I’m going to go out with friends, and make new friends.”  He looked surprised.  Did he really think I was going to be a loner?  ME?

So, the next three days will be very interesting.  I know we will have fun, but there’s the underlying tension of his knowing he’s leaving and his fears and stress and depression.  It’s not going to be easy – for either of us.  Yet this is what has to be done.  He knows he has to go and I know he has to go.  I just hope he will change his mind about seeing all our friends.  I know they want to see him.  I know it would be great for him to see how many people love him, and to enjoy their company.  That’s something he was sorely lacking in SD.  He never made friends.  The only friends he had were friends I introduced him to.

In NY he has his own friends, and OUR friends – friends that we made together and friends who really love him.  There’s also his whole family, and I know he won’t have any problem being with them, so at least I know he’ll be surrounded by people who love him.

I woke up while it was still dark.  I told myself not to start thinking, to just go back to sleep, but of course my wheels started turning and I was thinking all sorts of things.  It’s obvious I have anxiety.  I don’t have depression, but I DO have anxiety and I’m also taking medication for it.  I say this, because I know my friends and family are worried about me, too – not just Eric – and I want them to know I’m doing everything I can to keep it together.

I did fall back to sleep, but then I woke up because Eric got up.  He wanted to get the oil changed on the car before he left, so I wouldn’t have to deal with it.  I do appreciate that he thinks of these things.  I know that causes him a lot of anxiety – worrying about how I’ll get along without him – but really, the oil change place is down the block and it only takes ½ hour, so I think I could handle it, if I had to!

He’s also super-stressed about the fact that the RV isn’t sold, but I told him he’ll be able to help from afar, because I can put them on the phone with him while they’re looking at it, or if they want info before they come to see it.  It would definitely help if he’s here, but I can do it without him.  The good news is that it’s in MY name, so at least we won’t have a problem selling it because of him being in NY.

So, Eric went and got the oil changed and when he got back we left to go to the CITY HEIGHTS FARMER’S MARKET.  It opened on June 7th and I’ve been wanting to go ever since.  It’s only open on Saturdays from 9am – 1:0pm, and Eric and I have SUCH A hard time getting out the door early on a Saturday.  It was after 11:00am by the time we left, but we knew we’d have almost 2 hours there, so it seemed early enough.

We drove about 5 miles and saw that it was in a very Mexican neighborhood.  We got a great spot – right across the street from the entrance, but – unfortunately – it was much smaller than we anticipated.  There were different vendors selling fresh organic fruits and vegetables (and giving free samples of everything) and a man selling Kettle Corn (we bought a small bag for $3), a woman selling some kind of triangle-shaped pastry with different stuff inside.  I got a cream cheese and Eric got a chicken.  They were $1 each and were SO delicious.  I could have eaten 10 of them!

There were a bunch of young girls and guys playing instruments and singing in Spanish.  They were adorable. 

There was a woman selling home-made soaps, and another selling jewelry.  There were a few others selling food, and then there was a booth to visit to see if you qualified for assistance for food, so I’m guessing it was a pretty poor neighborhood.  We were finished with the whole market in about 15 minutes, so we decided to go to THE BIG KITCHEN in South Park for brunch.

There was no wait (which is pretty amazing for a Saturday morning, but I guess it was almost Saturday afternoon!) and we got a booth right away.  As we were sitting there, I noticed – for the first time – a small stuffed Betty Boop doll on a shelf with a lot of other stuffed animals and characters.

I also saw a set of mugs I sold in my shop.  They were designed by a woman (I forget her name) and were from the 1940s.  Each mug in the set had a beautiful, sexy woman as the handle and on each mug she was in various stages of undress.  The first she was wearing a red gown.  In the next one, it was around her waist, on the next one she was pulling it over her head.  In the next, she was totally naked.  They were pretty fabulous bar ware and I was so surprised to see them again!  Some of you may remember them from the shop!

Eric had pancakes with scrambled eggs and home fries.  I had a grilled cheese with tuna and tomato on rye.  I guess you’d usually call it a tuna melt, but it was a grilled cheese sandwich and they just add the tuna and tomatoes.  It was the best I’ve ever had!

After brunch, we decided to drive to OCEAN BEACH.  I’ve been dying to go there since we moved here, because I heard there was a street called NEWPORT AVENUE where there are tons of antique shops.

We programmed Betty to find an address on NEWPORT AVENUE and found it was 10 miles from South Park (closer to us in Clairemont).  We were there in about 15 minutes and found a great spot right on the main street.  We went in and out of all the stores, heading towards the beach.

The "Limo" for the OCEAN BEACH HOTEL was an old Woodie De Soto!

We stopped in STARBUCKS and got something cold to drink and then sat on a wall by the beach and watched the surfers and sunbathers.  When we finished our drinks we walked back on the other side of the street, going in and out of more stores, until we found a large antique mall – 18,000 square feet with over 100 vendors!  We must have been in there for over an hour.  It was called the NEWPORT AVENUE ANTIQUE CENTER (how original!) and was an antique mall, which means that each little booth was owned by a different vendor and they take turns running the whole place.  They’ll only give you 10% off on anything unless it’s marked otherwise in their booth.

There was SO much to look at – lots of great stuff – and I was lucky enough to find a beautiful clear rhinestone pin by KRAMER at a great price.

Eric admired some custom Harley Davidson Motorcycles!

I fell in love with one booth in the Antique Mall, because it was set up so beautifully.  Tons of vintage kitchen ware (which I love)!

Here's something I found that is along the same lines as my jewelry mosaics.  Someone took vintage costume jewelry and made it into a fancy Christmas Tree!  Very clever!

I just thought this display of vintage threads was so colorful.  If I had a sewing room...

There was a booth of vintage bakelite, which is an early form of plastic they used to make tons of FABULOUS jewelry and other items.  Here are sets of colorful dominoes!

I knew Geri and Sergio would enjoy seeing this cookie jar, which was designed by someone I know -- Rex Morache -- for NJ Croce!!!

Here's another piece of Betty -- made by VANDOR -- which I absolutely adore.  It looks a lot bigger than it really is -- only about 6 inches tall and hangs on the wall.  I have about 6 of these ceramic hooks, which form a kick line -- but I've never paid more than $30 for one and this was priced at $80!!!!

Here was our favorite stop of the day!

Next we found a place called VIGNETTES – for the French-inspired home…garden…soul.  From the moment I walked through their doors, I was in love.  I took tons of photos, so I could share it with you.  First of all, someone is VERY clever with seashells and you KNOW how I love that!  It’s the perfect environment, since it’s right by the beach, and it was so beautifully displayed.

As soon as we walked in, we were greeted by this magnificent mannequin, decked out in seashells and rhinestones.  It spells out "She sells sea shells" on her chest!

A statue bedecked, a wedding cake, and a topiary.  All beautifully done!  The gold coins on the table are chocolates -- which Eric and I enjoyed!

This mirror was absolutely magnificent.  I asked who did all these pieces, but they were very secretive about it.  Not sure what that was about!  BTW -- there's me in the mirror!

I don't think this would be too comfortable to sit in, but what an artistic and clever piece!  I'd love to try this with jewelry!

Another bedecked beauty!

Look familiar?  I knew I wasn't the only person who ever thought to do this, but to see something so very close to my work was a little disconcerting.  Still, it made me think maybe THEY'D like to have my things in their shop!

This wire mannequin was covered with their business cards, which are so pretty!

Next there was a HUGE showcase with TONS of vintage costume jewelry and the prices were TO DIE FOR!  There was a man looking at some pieces and we started talking.  He was explaining that all the merchandise in one particular case was from this man Erik and that his prices were great.  I couldn’t believe my eyes.  In a place like VIGNETTES you’d usually expect to pay top dollar, yet the prices were cheaper than the antique mall we just visited.  He was a dealer and said that he would buy pieces here and turn them around and sell them, so you know the prices were great.

I decided to give him my business card, told him what I do, and asked him if he had any broken jewelry to sell.  He said he did, and would be in touch!

After looking at everything in the case, I found a huge round rhinestone pin that was the brighest orange I had ever seen.  It had small round, larger round and marquis-shaped stones, with matching clip-on earrings.  I never wear the earrings, but it was sold as a set, so I took them.  I have so many different colored rhinestone pins (and I used to only collect clear, until we started cross-country!), but I never saw anything so big, bright and orange.  It’s really gorgeous!  It would look so magnificent on a black jacket.

We bought that one, too, so I ended up getting two new pieces for my collection.  After we paid for the pin, the woman behind the counter asked us if we had been inside for the party.  Turns out it was their 13th anniversary celebration and they invited us to enjoy some champagne and dessert pastries.

Why don't I have a rhinestone bra?

Here's a display holding lots of rhinestone tiaras.  All the displays were painted gold, which made it so beautiful, fancy, and elegant.

We walked around some more and ended up in the back room.  Every inch of this place was decorated to the max with that shabby chic French-inspired style I so adore.  There was a bar with a guy serving champage or ice-water, but we just had a few tiny cupcakes, some gourmet marshmallows, macaroons dipped in white chocolate, and some of those egg-white cookies that melt in your mouth.  It was a nice treat so many hours after lunch.  We weren’t really hungry, but we hadn’t had dessert, so it hit the spot!

Another fabulous piece with seashells!

As we were leaving, Eric said, “Wouldn’t it be nice to win the lottery and just walk in here and buy everything you liked?”  I guess it would, but it would kind of take the fun out of it if you could have ANYTHING.  It’s nice to pick and choose and feel great about having one or two pieces – at least I feel that way and I really appreciate it!

By now it was after 4:30pm and I was exhausted, so we drove back to the apartment and watched last night’s episode of MONK, which was the season finale.  The season just started on July 17th, and after 2 months it’s all over until January!  It’s a good thing I love this show enough to watch repeats.  This episode was SO great.  Monk was hypnotized and he regresses to about 9 years old.  He was so cute and funny, and still able to solve crimes!

Is she fabulous or WHAT?

My eyes were closing as I watched and as soon as it was over I took a nap.  Eric kept watching TV and woke me up a little before 8:00pm.

Still more seashells!

We jumped in the shower, got dressed, and drove to CONVOY STREET to go back to the Vietnamese restaurant we visited on Eric’s birthday in June.  We had another delicious meal.  I had a noodle soup with shrimp, tofu and tomatoes.  Eric had a shrimp dish with broccoli and walnuts and we shared a Vietnamese crepe with seafood.  There was so much food that we brought home most of the shrimp dish!

Next, we drove to LITTLE ITALY to visit PAPPALECCO and get some gelato for dessert.  While there we ran into GILI – of GILI ANNA’S in La Jolla!  It was such a pleasant surprise.   She was there with her boyfriend.  We had told her Eric was leaving to go back to NY and now we told her he was leaving on Tuesday.  She immediately invited me to a get-together she’s having in two Thursdays.  I told her I would love to come and she said she’d email me.  I got to meet her boyfriend, and then we got our gelato and left.

When we got home Eric watched the Saturday night fights, and I immediately started blogging.  I have SO many photos to download, resize, save and upload, so I don’t know how long this is going to take, but I’ll stay up all night if I have to!!!

We had a really great day.  There were moments of tension, when we’d both think about the fact that he’s leaving, or start talking about things we need to do, but otherwise it was totally pleasant, fun, and enjoyable.  Just what we needed!

I was supposed to finish uploading all the pictures after Saturday Night Live, but we both fell asleep before it was over.  Sorry this is late.  Hope you enjoyed!

The first thing I thought of when I woke up this morning was that I never finished the blog last night!  I had worked on it for almost 2 hours and stopped to have gelato and watch SNL with Eric.  Unfortunately, we both fell asleep!  So, I finished it this morning.

I never uploaded the pictures from the concert (and they didn’t come out very good, so you weren’t missing much), but here are a few:

We didn’t do anything exciting today.  We watched TV, relaxed and did stuff around the apartment (Eric’s getting all his stuff together), we did a few loads of laundry, and then we went out for a ride in the RV.  Eric wanted to make sure everything was okay.  We only drove it for a half hour, and I know Eric hates that thing with a passion, but it brought back good memories for me.  I really loved traveling in it, and I thought it would be something we’d do forever.  Unfortunately, he hates to fly, and now he hates RVs, so it looks like our traveling days are over.

When we got back to the apartment we parked the RV on the street – across from the apartment – so that the FOR SALE sign is visible on the street.  It should be okay there for a week or two and I hope to sell it before too long.  We figured it would sell easier if someone saw the sign, and it would be easier to show it, if I didn’t have to bring them on the property.

In the late afternoon we went to the STUDIO DINER for a late lunch/early dinner.  We both had a cup of home-made Jewish penicillin – Chicken Soup.  I figured there wouldn’t be much chicken in there, just vegetables and noodles, but there was TONS, so I was constantly spooning the chicken pieces into Eric’s cup.  It was really good and obviously not from a can.  I used to love making chicken soup – back when I ate chicken – and it tasted a lot like mine.

I used to use a Ronzoni noodle called Tubettini #42.  It wasn’t too small, but it wasn’t too big, and it really made the soup into a meal.  I’d make a giant pot and then we’d eat it for weeks!  I’d freeze it in quart containers and just take it out and heat it up whenever we wanted some.  I made some darn good chicken soup!

After the soup, Eric had Boob Sandwich, which is Bacon, Lettuce, Tomato, and Avocado (don’t ask me why it’s called Boob!).  I had the crab sandwich, which is a favorite of mine there.  We both had chocolate egg creams.

We were going to drive down by the bay and sit on the grass for a while, but I really had to go to the bathroom (TMI?  Sorry!), so we headed back to the apartment and then we both decided we’d rather just relax at home.

I ended up falling asleep (so what else is new?) and Eric watched TV.  He woke me and then we cleaned Conrad’s cage.  It’s a weekly ritual, which I’ll now be doing by myself from now on.  First we put his cage on the table in the dining area.  Then, we take the snack table he’s on and shake out the fabric tablecloth outside (it’s got seeds on it).  Then, we vacuum the entire area, because seed falls on the floor, along with his little down feathers that he is constantly removing while grooming.  It’s funny, because my other birds used to go through a week where they’d moult like crazy, but he just seems to lose his “baby” feathers and I don’t notice any tail feathers or bigger feathers.

Anyway, Eric holds him and I take apart the entire cage, washing every piece and then putting it all back together again.  Then we put him back inside and put him back on his table next to my bed.  It looks so nice when it’s all fresh and clean, but it doesn’t take long for him to mess it up.  Birds ARE messy, there’s no doubt about it.  Their seed flies everywhere, and their feathers float everywhere.

After we put Conrad back, I asked Eric to help me move the furniture around a little in the living room.  Since his black massage chair is gone, I could move the couch over a lot and then move my desk over, because I noticed that if people walk by they can see the computer and me a little under the bottom of the vertical blinds.  We moved it about 2 feet to the left, and it looks the same, but now it’s more private.

I want to get rid of the TV stand we bought at the Salvation Army for the TV, because Eric shipped back the TV and the DVD/VHS player, so I don’t need it anymore and I’m definitely not bringing it back to NY, because it would cost more to ship than it’s worth!

I’m actually going to offer it to our friend, Bob, because he might be able to use it in his den/TV room.  It may be too small to hold the flat screen TV he wants to get, but maybe not! 

There’s such a sadness in the air.  I know you can imagine how it feels to say goodbye to someone you love and know you won’t see them for a while.  It’s not so bad if you know they’ll be okay, but when you’re worried about them already, and you’ll be so far apart, it’s very stressful.  Eric and I talked today about how stressed out and anxious we both are.  Eric said he sometimes thinks the anxiety is worse than the depression.  I know when I sell the RV it will be a big load off his mind, because that’s something that really worries him.

Also, as time goes on and he sees I’m okay here by myself, and he gets adjusted to life in NY, I’m hoping his anxiety will be reduced.  I know I’ll be super-anxious until I know he’s okay there and settling in.  Once his stuff arrives, and everything’s okay, I’m hoping he will be able to relax a little.

Tomorrow we’re going to stay busy – running a lot of errands and maybe taking a drive somewhere, too.  It’s our last day together and it seems unreal.

I do have some good news!  I found out that the young couple who bought our house just had their third daughter!  She wrote me from the hospital!  She said they love the house so much and it’s the perfect place to raise their children.  Their oldest is starting kindergarten and the school is very close by.  She said they don’t have to worry about the kids running into the street, because there is so little traffic there, so they can play more freely.  They’re just so happy and it makes me happy that someone else is enjoying our little house now!

We managed to stay in bed until 9:00am this morning, but I don’t think either of us was sleeping much.  I dozed on and off – and had some weird dreams – but I know Eric wasn’t sleeping well.  I stayed up until 2:00am last night, watching shows I had recorded, but Eric fell asleep before midnight.

We had cereal again for breakfast (Cheerios!) and watched LIVE WITH REGIS AND KELLY, which I haven’t seen in months and months.  It's GUINNESS WORLD'S RECORD week and every day they have someone else who is trying to break a world's record.  Today it was a big strong guy pulling 150,000 pounds on a truck.  He did it, too!

Meanwhile, I received a letter from the Board of Equalization that I didn’t pay my sales tax and had to pay by September 30th or risk a fine of up to $5,000.  I had previously tried to pay online two times, but they told me nothing was due at the time.  I finally went online today and paid -- $7.82!!  That’s what I owed!  I didn’t make much at the crafts fair and I knew I didn’t owe much, so I wasn’t too worried about it.  Wow, glad I was able to do it online.  I was afraid I’d have to go back downtown, wait on line and pay in person.  That’s another thing resolved!

We left the house around noon, and ran a bunch of errands.  We went to the HALLMARK store on Balboa, because I wanted to buy a new baby card for the couple who bought our house.  I’m so happy for them!

Eric’s sister, Ellen, called when I was about to go into the card store.  I spoke to her for a few minutes, then Eric spoke to her while I was shopping.  When I got out, she was still on the phone, so I spoke to her for another few minutes.

Then, we went to STAPLES in Pacific Beach, because I wanted to get an ink cartridge for my printer.  Eric stayed in the car and spoke to his friend, Jimmy.  Jim can’t wait for Eric to get back to NY.  He really has good friends in NY and they are being very supportive.

Next, we drove to Fashion Valley and had lunch at the CALIFORNIA PIZZA KITCHEN.  Someone at work left flyers in the kitchen there saying that today, tomorrow and Wednesday at California Pizza Kitchen they would donate 20% of any purchase to the SUSAN G. KOMEN BREAST CANCER FOUNDATION, so I thought it was as good a place as any to have lunch!

I had ½ portion of Miso Salad: Shredded Napa cabbage with fresh avocado, julienne cucumbers, daikon, edamame, carrots, red cabbage, green onions, cilantro, crispy rice noodles and crisp wontons tossed in a Miso dressing and topped with blue crab and shrimp.  I also had a cup of Sedona Tortilla Soup: Vine-ripened tomatoes, tomatillos and corn with mild green chiles and Southwestern spices. Garnished with crispy corn tortilla strips.

Eric had ½ portion of the original Barbecue Chicken Chopped Salad: Chopped lettuce, black beans, sweet corn, jicama, cilantro, basil, crispy corn tortilla strips and Monterey Jack cheese tossed together in herb ranch dressing. Topped with chopped BBQ chicken breast, diced tomatoes and green onions.  He also had a cup of Adobe Chicken Chowder.

As we were eating our delicious soups and salads, we saw the waitress walk by with a piece of Red Velvet cake, which is my absolute favorite, since we first had it in Graceland.  The salads were HUGE (and we got the ½ portion!!!), so we finished our soups (it was a very big cup, too!) and took home enough salad to have for dinner tonight!  We shared a piece of the Red Velvet cake and it was as good as we remembered!

After we left the restaurant we decided to walk around the Fashion Valley Mall a little bit.  It is REALLY big, with all the top stores – Coach, Gucci, Saks, Bloomingdale’s, Macy’s, among many others, along with all the big chains.  I saw an Anthropologie, and I love that store, so we decided to walk around a little.  Their prices are VERY high, so I asked the sales girl where the sales items were and she showed me to a room in the back.  I found a gorgeous black/white dress that just screamed “PEPPY!”  It was originally almost $200, but it was on sale for less than half.  I tried it on, it fit perfectly, and I bought it!

Eric was very sweet, because he waited patiently while I shopped around and then encouraged me to buy the dress.  I hardly ever go to the mall and even less frequently buy anything this way.  I’m a catalog girl – cheap catalogs – so this was a real departure for me.

We walked around a little more and then headed home.  Eric filled my tank with gas, because in San Diego they only have self-service and I HATE pumping gas.  Eventually, I'll have to do it myself, but I'd like to put it off as long as possible!

We still wanted to go to RITE-AID and KEIL’S (pronounced KYLE’S).  When we got home and dropped off the salads and our shopping from the day (HALLMARK, STAPLES, ANTHROPOLGIE) we decided to relax and take a nap before heading out again, which is exactly what we did.

We went back out at 6:00pm and picked up a few items at RITE-AID and KEIL’S and then came back home.  We finished our salads and watched DEAL OR NO DEAL and PROJECT RUNWAY.  You KNOW Eric is being agreeable, because he doesn’t really like DEAL OR NO DEAL (he finds it too frustrating) and he’s definitely not into PROJECT RUNWAY, but not only does he watch it with me, he gives me his opinions on the design creations walking down the runway!

We are both still super-stressed and very sad about Eric’s impending departure, but I guess we’re both resigned to the fact that it’s going to happen and might as well make the best of it.

I’m hoping we will both get a good night’s sleep, but I’m really not counting on it.  Tomorrow we will leave around 6:30am and I’ll drop him off at the airport at around 6:45am.  His JET BLUE flight is at 8:00am, so that will give him plenty of time to check one bag, get through security, buy himself a snack (and maybe a book) and then get on the plane.  He’ll get off at JFK at 4:20pm and his sister will pick him up.

I know he doesn’t like to fly (really -- that's an understatement -- he HATES it), so this is doubly hard for him, but I think he’s got it in his mind that he really has to make the best of a bad situation.  He really tried so hard today to be positive and showed me he can make it in NY.  As usual, my optimism is kicking in, and I’m starting to believe everything will be okay!

Eric and I hardly slept.  The alarm went off and we got up, showered, dressed, and left for the airport.  In the car, Eric reiterated to me that he would be okay, but he wasn’t very convincing.

He went into the airport terminal, and I drove off to work.  It was okay this morning – busy, but not too bad – but I was so distracted and I kept making mistakes.  It’s a good thing my co-worker knows Eric left this morning.  She was very sympathetic.

At noon I went down to HR.  Eric called at about 1:30pm my time (4:30pm NY time) to say he had safely landed and his sister, Susan, was coming to pick him up at Kennedy Airport.  He said the flight wasn't bad and he felt okay.  He sounded pretty good. 

I got right back to work, because I had SO much to do.  There’s this lovely woman I work with who I think is just fabulous.  She’s sweet, hard-working, and very helpful and supportive.  She’s training me now, because she’s going on sabbatical in October and I’ll be taking over her job.  She just transferred here in August, so she’s pretty new at the job, too, although she’s been with the firm forever.

Yesterday, because I was out, she volunteered to print out and process all the resumes.  Unfortunately, she only knew part of the process, so it wasn’t done correctly.  It was a big help time-wise that she printed out and processed everything, but it made me so stressed, because my routine was disrupted and because she didn’t know all the steps necessary, I had to go back and finish each resume she input.

By the time I left (at a little after 5:00pm), I had completed all the resumes she did for me, but I didn’t get anything new done today.  I thought maybe I’d stay late, since I had my own car, but I really didn’t have the energy.

When I got home, I parked the car in the lot.  Now that the RV is on the street, with the big FOR SALE sign in the window, I can park the PT in the lot again.  It’s not much different than the street, because there’s usually a spot right in front, but I guess it’s safer.

I got my mail and walked up to the apartment.  It seemed very strange to know Eric wasn’t going to be in there, but – remember – I had been through this back in July, so it’s not the first time I’ve been alone here.

I got undressed, and tried to decide if I should have something to eat, take a nap, or work on the computer.  I decided to just relax and watch some TV.  I told Conrad it’s just me and him now, and he better get used to it.  He really seemed to like Eric a lot and I know Eric really liked him, too.

I called Eric and spoke to him for a few minutes.  He didn’t sound great and there really wasn’t much to say.  He is going to be busy the next few days – he’s going to the Union to check for work, to DMV to get his New York driver’s license, and his stuff is arriving tomorrow night!

Then, I called my parents, because I had told them Eric was going back to NY, but I hadn’t told them when.  I figured I should probably let them know.  My mother is so wonderful, because she really believes in us and she said she knows it will all turn out okay.  She doesn’t even worry about me being out here by myself.  She said she knows I can take care of myself, which really makes me feel great.

While I was on the phone with my Mom, my friend Geri called, just to let me know she’s there for me (as if I could ever forget).  She and Larry have been so supportive and so loving, as have so many of our friends.  They’re all reaching out to us, and it really means a lot.  Good friends really make everything better.

While I was talking to Geri, my sister-in-law, Susan, called.  Susan said Eric was doing okay, and she was going to be there for him, which I already knew.  It’s amazing how strong she is.  She is sure that he just needs a couple of weeks to get his act together.  She’s very optimistic.  I just hope she’s right!

My niece, Melissa is having her operation tomorrow.  She’s been in the hospital a week and they’re just figuring out what they want to do.  This is a very serious surgery, and she will be under for about 4 hours.  We love Melissa so much and just want her to get better.  I’m happy they’re finally doing something, and I know this will make her better.  It’s just so frustrating that she had to suffer for so long before they finally figured out she needed the operation.  I know she just wants to get it over with, and get well already.  Melissa – we love you and we are praying for your speedy recovery!

After I hung up with everyone I made myself some MORNINGSTAR veggie chick’n nuggets.  I didn’t go food shopping this weekend.  We just went yesterday to pick up SNAPPLES (because I can’t live without them!).  I should go and get myself some fresh veggies and fish, so I can make a nice dinner, but I’m just not motivated to cook for myself.  I didn’t mind doing it for me and Eric, but I’m so lazy for just me.

I watched some TV, worked on the computer, and tried to enjoy the peace and quiet.  It’s not like Eric was noisy – yelling or anything – it’s just that his constant negativism and complaining was so draining.  His half-empty glass syndrome really got me down and not having to listen to it at all for a while (or at least just for a few minutes on the phone) is actually a relief.

I feel so stressed and I know exercise would really help.  Jimmy said I should go for a walk, and I know I should have done it tonight, but I just wanted to get undressed and lie in bed.  I worked on the computer and addressed some cards (new babies, birthdays, etc.). 

At 8:30pm my time (11:30pm NY time) Eric called again.  He sounded much better.  He said he just wanted to say goodnight before he watched Jay Leno (he loves his monologues).  When he tries, he really sounds good and together, but sometimes I think he gives in to the negative feelings and doesn’t try harder.  Obviously, I don’t know what it’s like to be depressed, and maybe someone who does know would tell me it’s not a matter of giving in or fighting it.  I just don’t know.  Our therapist said many times that Eric has to change his way of thinking.  He has to put the negative thoughts out of his mind and think positively.  It’s just a big change and it’s something you have to relearn.

So, he’s there and I’m here and I just have to wait and see what happens.  It’s not easy.  I’m a do-er – a person who makes things happen, but this time there wasn’t a darn thing I could do.  I just had to let things happen and now I have to just be patient while Eric finds his way.  I know he can do it.  I believe in him.

I slept pretty well last night, considering.  I woke up this morning and actually got to get dressed with the lights on!  I always dressed in the dark, because Eric was always sleeping, and it’s amazing how different outfits can look in the light of day!  One day I realized I had on navy blue capri pants, instead of black, and it bothered me all day long, because it didn’t match my outfit!

I spent a lot of time today thinking of my niece, Melissa, because I knew she had her operation today.  Someone was supposed to let me know everything was okay, and I'm assuming it was, because Eric never mentioned it when I spoke to him.  I know he has a lot on his mind, and I forgot to ask him, so I guess I'll hear from her tomorrow! 

Elsa picked me up and we had a nice ride to work, as usual.  I got upstairs and immediately started to work on another data entry project.  We have another huge mailing to do and I needed to get account names and addresses from one database and put it into an excel spreadsheet.  It’s easy work, just very monotonous and repetitive.

One thing that makes it so much easier is the toggle function that my co-worker taught me.  I never knew about it and it’s really wonderful and makes going back and forth between two different documents so much easier.  Do you know about the “toggle feature?”  If not, press “alt” and hit “tab.”  If you’re in your email, but you also have WORD or POWERPOINT open, it will show you a window and you can toggle between anything you have open.  Just keep your finger on the “alt” key and keep hitting “tab.”   Try it – just be sure you have more than one program open!

Anyway, I alt-tab back and forth between Excel and the database and just copy and paste the information, finding one account after another.  It’s boring, but the times does go by and I’m making a contribution, and isn’t that what it’s all about?

At one point I had to run down to HR, because one of the girls is training me on different jobs that she does.  When a new employee starts, they take their picture and put it on a badge that gets them from floor to floor in the elevator and into certain doors in the building.  Today I learned how to take the picture (it comes up on the computer screen) and how to get the badges activated.  There are actually two – one is for the building (if you come after hours you can still get in) and one is for the firm.

Before I got to HR at noon I stopped in the cafeteria.  There’s a really nice guy who works there and I had asked last week if he had his turkey or chicken noodle soup, because it’s really delicious and I love the broth.  He said he didn’t, but he made some especially for me and one of the girls emailed to let me know!  I thought that was SO sweet, so of course I had to go and get some.  I ask for mostly broth, but there are lots of veggies in there, too, and a mix of noodles.  I guess he uses whatever he has in the kitchen!  There’s also occasionally a piece of turkey or chicken, but I just leave that in the bottom of the cup!

After lunch, I started working on my resumes.  I was kind of behind because I was out on Monday, so I had my work cut out for me.  When I ran errands with Eric on Monday I had to go to STAPLES to get a black and white cartridge for my Lexmark printer, and I saw these beautiful file folders.  I decided to get them and make up a folder for each job we are trying to fill.  I usually just hand the girls a bunch of resumes (each girl has responsibility for different positions), but today I gave them their pile in a beautiful file folder with the job name on it and they LOVED it!

I just think it will keep them organized and make their desks look pretty.  And isn’t THAT what it’s all about, too?

At 5:00pm Elsa and I headed home.  I invited Elsa to go see DREAMGIRLS with me this weekend, since Eric won’t be here.  I initially invited Jimmy, but it was such short notice, so he’s coming down to visit in a few weeks instead.

Elsa said she’d love to go, but her mother is supposed to come to town for the weekend, so if she can’t I’m going to ask another girl I work with in HR.  She’s single, so I figure she would like going out.  She’s a lot of fun, too – one of my favorites in the group.  I told Elsa if I can’t find anyone to go with me (it IS very short notice), I’ll just go myself.  I really wouldn’t mind at all.  I’m not going to miss a show just because I don’t have anyone to go with.

When I got home I made a snack of edamame.  I was watching DR. PHIL when Eric called.  He sounded pretty good.  I spoke to him 3 or 4 times today and each time I could see he was really making an effort to be “up” but I kind of didn’t believe it.   Anyway, he’s really trying, and that’s what counts.

After I hung up with him, I fell asleep.  I woke up after 8:00pm.  Boy, that’s going to screw me up later, isn’t it?  I had some great TV on tonight – AMERICA’S GO TALENT, PROJECT RUNWAY, AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL, and TOP DESIGN.  Okay, so they’re all reality shows, but they’re all new!

I’m going to have a bowl of Cheerios, watch some TV and hope I fall back to sleep before midnight!

The first thing I want to talk about is the fact that Eric worked today.  Yes, he arrived Tuesday afternoon, his stuff arrived Wednesday night (it was picked up here on the 10th and shipped across the country in just 7 days!).  He got a job on Wednesday and started work today.

Now, don’t get too excited.  In Eric’s line of work it really doesn’t mean a thing.  He could get laid off tomorrow.  It’s not like you can count on a job, or know for sure that you’ll have it for an extended period of time.  You can’t count on anything.  You just have to take it day by day.  I was just so proud of him, because he found work immediately!

I thought about him as soon as the alarm went off, and I wondered how he was doing at work (since it was already 9:00am there).  I drove myself to work this morning, because I had therapy tonight after work.  I don’t mind the drive at all – it’s less than 15 minutes door to door. 

I had told Eric that I would call him at 9:00am my time, when he goes to lunch at noon.  Unfortunately, it was SO busy and I just completely forgot.  I had only been at work for an hour and the time flew by so quickly.  I just didn’t think it was time yet.  Then, Eric called me at 9:20am my time – while he was at lunch.  He wasn’t doing very well.  He was missing me, and he wasn’t feeling great, and he was just very down.

It upset me terribly and affected the rest of my day.  I was distracted and kept making stupid mistakes.  It’s a good thing my co-worker checks everything, before I send it, because I had mistakes in every single email!  I apologized and she just blew it off and said, “Don’t worry.  I’ve done the same thing!”  She’s so sweet and I really appreciate her understanding.  She knows Eric is in NY and knows it’s been very hard for me.  I am SO lucky to have this job.  If not for this job, I don’t know where I’d be or what I’d do.  I am so comfortable at this place, after being there over 7 months, so at times like today – when I’m upset and anxious – I know it will be okay.

At noon I went down to HR.  I’m being taught many different HR procedures, and today I got more training.  This will go on for the next 3 weeks, until both girls are on sabbatical and I’m hoping by then I’ll be in HR full time.  It’s not that I don’t like it upstairs – I definitely do.  It’s just that I’d rather be in one place for 8 hours a day and if I had to choose, it would definitely be HR.  The work is just so interesting there.  It’s all about people!

I left the office a little before 5:00pm and drove to my appointment.  It was really great to talk to her and she gave me great ideas and good advice.  She’s really interested in helping ME now, rather than Eric.  When Eric was here, the therapy was really all about him, because of course he’s very depressed and needed more help.  Now, she’s happy she can focus on me and I’m happy, because I need the help, too!

I told her that I feel like I should be exercising, or taking a yoga class and she rolled her eyes and said I’m being too hard on myself.  She said, “I can’t believe what you’re going through right now and you’re beating yourself up for not exercising?”  I told her I knew it would be good for me, but she just waved her hand and said, “You do whatever makes you feel good.  Just be easy on yourself.”

She always says I’m too hard on myself and I worry too much.  She makes me feel good about myself, because she says I’m strong and that I’m holding it together for the both of us – and it’s a big strain, believe me.  So, I guess I’m going to relax a little and just “be” for a little while. 

I did ask Elsa if she could go to DREAMGIRLS on Saturday night, but she couldn’t make it, so I asked another girl at work and she was very excited.  So, it looks like I have a date!  I’m so happy, because she’s a lot of fun and I really like her.  She doesn’t know that Eric is away, but I guess it may come out on Saturday night.  I don’t mind telling people, I just don’t want them to feel sorry for me, or think that my marriage is in trouble, because it’s not.  Eric just needs to get healthy and we’ll be together again.

When I got home, I called him up and we had a great conversation.  He was feeling better and was more positive.  I told him how proud I was of him for getting a job so quickly, and I told him he has to give it time and everything will fall into place.  He misses me, and I miss him, and that’s okay, because we will be reunited soon enough.

It’s only 8 weeks until Jessica and Ken’s wedding and we’ll be together for almost 2 weeks, including Thanksgiving at my sister’s house, which we’re really looking forward to.

I think if Eric can just take it day by day, getting stronger and healthier, he will be his old self – or better – before you know it!  He just has to get back on that bicycle, hit the mountains and ride.  That’s what always made him happy, and I know it will happen again.  Of course, working is the next best thing, because he’ll get into a routine, feel like he’s making a contribution, earn money, and maybe even make some friends.  But even if this job ends, I’m sure he’ll find another.  He’s a great worker and any company that he works for is lucky to have him!

Before I close, I must tell you that our building manager and his wife just had a baby and I got to see her tonight.  She's absolutely gorgeous.  It's such a miracle when you see a new baby -- just 2 days old.  I told them I'm available for babysitting and I think they may just take me up on it!  The only problem is -- they'd have to bring the baby here (okay, it's only about 100 feet from their door to mine), because they have 2 cats and I'm allergic.  But I'd be happy to babysit anytime they like.  I think it would be so much fun!

I woke up at 5:15am, because Conrad was going crazy in his cage again.  I’ll never know what makes him do that.  Is he falling off his perch in his sleep?  Is he having a bad dream?  Is there something in the room (me?) that makes him nervous?  I have no idea.  It took me a while to fall back to sleep, and then I’m really groggy when the alarm goes off.

So, let me tell you something else about Conrad.  He started chirping and singing about 2 weeks ago, and now he’s unstoppable!  He doesn’t sing when it’s quiet – only when the TV is on.  When music is playing he just sings along.  I don’t know why it took him almost 2 months to open his mouth, but he finally did and now it’s lovely.  I really enjoy hearing him sing and chirp and tweet.  It’s music to my ears!

I got dressed and then called Eric before I left the house.  I just had a few minutes, and I knew he was working, but I wanted him to know how much I miss him and love him.  He misses me, too.

When we got to work, I got myself an iced mocha from the coffee cart, which is a lovely way to start the day.  It’s just as good as STARBUCKS (and just as expensive!).  I had a very busy morning, but I still called Eric a little after 9:00am, when I knew he’d be at lunch.

He’s doing okay at work, and he’s feeling better about everything.  It’s good to talk to him when he sounds this way.  He’s so sweet and loving.  It seems impossible to me that we’re going to be apart for 2 months, until I return to NY for the wedding, but we’ll have to get by.  I know it will be harder for him than it is for me.  I don’t know how I came to be so strong, but I am and it makes me feel good to know I can get through just about anything.

I keep asking about my niece, Melissa, but she was in intensive care after her operation and no one knows much except she came out of the operation okay.  I am dying to talk to her, but I don’t know when she’ll be able to talk on the phone.  I’m going to try her cell phone tomorrow.  I’m surprised I haven’t gotten an email from her (which she sends on her cell).  She’s amazingly strong, so I know she’ll be well in no time.

I had a busy afternoon in HR.  I was trained to set up interviews, which I really enjoy.  I reserve the conference room, check the schedules of all the interviewers, send them a “place card” to hold the date and time, check with the candidate to see if he or she is available, then I confirm the date and time, and send the interviewers a schedule, the candidate’s resume, and a comment sheet for them to fill out.  It’s really nothing difficult, but there are a lot of steps.  I know the girls appreciate that they don’t have to do it, and I’m happy to do anything to make their lives easier.

I also learned how to take the pictures for the ID cards and I’ll be doing a few new employee badges on Monday.  Smile and say “Cheese!”

When I got home I called Eric (I know, I’m calling him a lot, but I really miss him – and he misses me.  I know it makes him feel better when he talks to me, so why not?).  Then, I relaxed and watched Dr. Phil.  I made myself a fast dinner of frozen veggies and a veggie burger. 

After I ate I started 2 loads of laundry.  I met a young girl in the laundry room who just moved here from Seattle.  Before that she lived in Virginia.  She said it was so nice to hear an Eastern accent and she knew I was from NY.  I said, “I get that ALL the time.”  Almost every single day someone comments on my accent.  It’s SO weird!

Anyway, she said she’s having a hard time adjusting, because Seattle was SO rainy and here it NEVER rains, and she likes the cold and the changes in season.  I told her my husband is the same way and he hates it here.  I didn’t tell her he’s already left.  I just couldn’t bear to bring it up.  She was very sweet and I wished her luck and said I hoped she’d be very happy here.  I told her this apartment complex is really great and everyone is nice and the manager is very pro-active, and it’s well-maintained.  She was happy to hear it!

Tomorrow I’m showing the RV in the afternoon.  This is a gentleman I’ve been corresponding with for a few weeks.  He’s very serious about the Chinook and he’s coming down with his 72-year-old mother to see it.  He’s really nice, and he’s in the air force.  He works in a hospital at Travis Air Force Base.  He’s very enthusiastic about the RV, so PLEASE – everyone – keep your fingers crossed that all goes well and the RV is SOLD!

Tomorrow night is the last show in my subscription with the San Diego Musical Theatre.  It’s DREAMGIRLS and I’m going with a friend I work with in HR.  She’s a doll and I really enjoy her company, so I’m happy we’re taking the next step in our friendship.  She’s picking me up and we’re going to drive downtown and park the car by the theatre and then walk and see what restaurants are around.  I’m really looking forward to the show, to a fun night out, and to enjoying my friend’s company.  Should be a great day tomorrow!

Today is my sister Audrey’s birthday, so I want to start this blog by saying, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" and wishing that all her dreams come true this year!

I had a wonderful day.  Everything seemed to go perfectly and you know how often that happens!

I woke up and relaxed around the apartment, spoke to Eric, had breakfast and then got dressed and went to the post office to get stamps.  I stopped at the new drive-through STARBUCKS on Balboa and Clairemont Drive on the way home and then came back to the apartment.

My potential buyer was supposed to arrive with his mom at around 1:00pm.  They got here a little earlier and I met them across the street by the RV.  They were both very sweet, nice, friendly, and enthusiastic about the Chinook.  I showed them the inside and every feature I could think of.  Then, I called Eric, so he could talk to the guy about a few little problems we had and talk to him about the condition, etc.

Then, we drove a few miles to Pacific Beach to bring it to a FORD dealership to be inspected.  I drove the PT Crusier and they followed me in the RV.  We left the RV there and got in the PT and I drove them to the Italian Restaurant on Garnet that Eric and I have been to a couple of times.  The guy said he wanted to treat me to lunch, so I figured pizza would be fine – not too expensive, but really good!

We had a ½ pepperoni and ½ mushroom and it was SO delicious.  We had great conversation and talked about a lot of things.  They lived in White Plains for a long time before moving to California.  So, we talked about New York (the World’s Fair) and the difference between California and New York.

I explained to them about Eric’s situation and that he wasn’t coming back.  I told them that was why there was a sense of urgency about selling the RV, because Eric wanted to sell it before he left.  Unfortunately, we weren’t able to do that, but it is working out okay, because this guy is very serious about it and I just hope the paperwork is all in order now and there is not too much red tape to deal with.  You know anything that can possibly go wrong will go wrong, and I’m ready for it.

When we finished lunch we went back to the FORD dealership and it was perfect timing, because they just finished inspecting the RV.  There was nothing found that we didn’t already tell him about, so he was pleased.  He drove the RV back and parked it on the street.  They wanted to take pictures of me standing by the RV – especially by the “Peppy G” license plate.  Then, I took pictures of them, and the guy took pictures of me and his mom.  It was so sweet!

Then, they got in my car and and I put it into the lot.  Then, they came up to the apartment.  His mom wanted to see examples of my crafts and I told her I had a lot of stuff in the apartment.  She also wanted to use my bathroom.

When they saw the shelves I have with all the Betty Boop he said, “I have to go get my camera!”  They loved the apartment and said I had it set up so nicely.  It was so nice to spend the afternoon with them.  They were both really lovely and I’m REALLY hoping that he gets the RV, because I would be happy to know that they’re going to enjoy it.

When they left, I jumped in the shower, got dressed and my girlfriend picked me up outside.  She drove downtown and we parked in the HORTON PLAZA PARKING GARAGE, which is right near the theatre.  We walked ½ block and found HENNESSEY’S, which is a great pub/restaurant that my friends, Marianne and Allan, had told me about.  We had a delicious dinner.  My girlfriend had a turkey burger and fries and I had the salmon special with penne and veggies.  I had SO much left over and the girl asked me if I wanted it boxed.  I said I’d love to, but we’re going to the theatre, and she said she’d hold it and to come back after the show – which we did!

Now, to the best part of the night.  The show was FANTASTIC.  I really cannot believe the amount of talent on one stage.  Every single cast member was amazing.  The girl who played Effie was so unbelievably talented.  She didn’t miss one note.  She had people in the audience screaming after her big number – I’M NOT GOING.  It was as good as on Broadway – and the movie, too.  I was so impressed.  I know it would be good, because GUYS & DOLLS and BYE BYE BIRDIE were also excellent productions, but this was just over the top great!

My girlfriend had never seen the show or the movie, so it was all new to her and she really loved it.  She was so happy she came with me, and I was so happy she was able to come.  She’s great company – never a dull moment, and we had great conversations all night long.  I am looking forward to other nights out with her!

After the show we walked back to the car (after picking up my leftovers) and then she drove me home.  I got in a little before midnight.  It was a wonderful day and a fabulous night.  Just what the doctor ordered!

Last night, after I finished blogging, I started watching SNL.  It was a new show with James Franco (who currently stars in PINEAPPLE EXPRESS).  I only got through the first 10 minutes and I was out like a light.

I woke up a few times during the night, and then woke up when the phone rang.  It was my sister-in-law, Susan, and I told her she woke me up.  I looked at the clock.  It was 9:30am!  I couldn’t believe I slept so late!  The problem was, I felt like I was drugged (and I wasn’t!) and I wanted to sleep more.  I told her I’d call her back and fell back to sleep for almost another hour.

When I woke up again, it was 10:20am.  I haven’t slept that long in a LONG time.  The bad thing was, I didn’t feel refreshed.  I still felt tired!  I didn’t get out of bed.  I called Eric and spoke to him.  Then, Susan.  Then I watched SNL from last night.  It was really funny.  James Franco is adorable!

I finally got up and took a shower, got dressed and went to KEIL’S (prounounced Kyle’s).  It was a fast food-shopping, because I only bought lots of fruit and vegetables and some DIET LEMON SNAPPLES, and a few other odds and ends.

It was the first time in about 6 weeks that they had the case of 12 DIET LEMON SNAPPLES.  They always have all the other flavors, but not the Diet Lemon!  I was so happy!  I put them in my cart but when I went up to the cashier, as he put them through to be rung up he heard broken glass.  Turns out one of the bottles had broken, although the others were fine.  They must have been put on the shelf that way, because it was all dried up inside!

Meanwhile, we tore it open and they gave me eight from that pack and a 4-pack for the same price as the 12 pack case.  We were transferring the good bottles and there was broken glass on some of them and I actually cut my thumb!  It was nothing serious, but I was so frustrated.  They NEVER have the Diet Lemon, and then they only had ONE case left and it had a broken bottle!

When I got home I washed all the bottles in the sink to make sure they were all clean of broken glass.  I have to make these last, because they said they’re having trouble getting SNAPPLES.  Do you think they’re going out of business?  What would I do?  I’d be like Elaine in that episode on SEINFELD where she went to every drug store in town trying to stock up on “the sponge.”  If anyone came over, I’d have to interview them, to see if they were “Snapple worthy.”

After food shopping I worked on the computer for a while.  I finally bought my tickets for NY in November to go to Jessica and Ken’s wedding.  It’s very exciting!  Eric can’t wait for me to get there, and I’m hoping by the time I arrive he has his own apartment, so I have a place to stay!  So many of my friends have dogs and cats, which means I can’t stay at their place.  I spoke to my friend, Marygrace, tonight and she offered her house to us – it’s animal free!  I thought that was fantastic and I’m sure we’ll take her up on it, if Eric is still at Susan’s (she has a dog).

I’m arriving in NY on Saturday morning, November 22nd and I’m leaving on Tuesday afternoon December 3rd.  I didn’t want to get involved with the crazy “after Thanksgiving” travel crowds, so I figured I’d stay an extra day or two.  The ticket was pretty reasonable, too.  Flying JET-BLUE out of San Diego non-stop to JFK – less than $400!

I would like to try to see as many people as possible on that Saturday night – the 22nd of November – the Saturday before Thanksgiving, so if you’re reading this – consider yourself invited!  I don’t know where yet, but I’m going to try to find a place to have a party, so I can see all our friends.  I know we’ll be away for Thanksgiving, and then we’ll be with family for the wedding, so if we want to try to see all our friends while I’m in NY, I figure I’d better get them all in one place at one time!  MARK YOUR CALENDARS!

I was on the phone for HOURS today – besides Eric, I spoke to Geri, Marygrace, and  Elaine and Brian.  So many good friends calling to see how Eric and I are doing.   It makes me so happy to know that there are wonderful friends out there who think of us.

I spoke to my niece shortly.  Melissa had her operation and everything went well, but she’ll still be in the hospital for a while – maybe a week.  She’s in a lot of pain and is feeling pretty bad, but she tells me “tomorrow will be better.”  Is she a trooper or WHAT?  I love that girl.  She is so strong, but so sweet and thoughtful.  It’s a wonderful combination.  I know she’ll be fine, but it kills me that she’s in so much pain right now.  I can’t wait to see her in November!

Tomorrow I’m supposed to go to Bob’s house after work, because the “window treatment lady” is coming and he’s afraid to make a decision without me!  I really think he knows what he wants, but if he wants me there to point him in the right direction, I’m happy to do it.  I brought him an ad from a local magazine for Smith & Noble window treatments and they come to your house for a free consultation.  It’s easier than going shopping, and they do all the measurements!

I’m also supposed to start working on another guy’s duplex apartment.  He’s been there a year and hasn’t done a thing, so he really needs a lot of help.  First thing – paint colors!  He knows what he wants, so that’s a step in the right direction.

If only I could make a living doing this.  Wouldn’t that be great?  It’s really fun and interesting, but I know it’s a very hard business to break into, so I guess I’ll just keep on temping.  I’m just enjoying the creativity of it all.  A career in interior decorating will have to wait a little longer!

I was so busy at work today that I didn’t email Jimmy once.  That’s UNHEARD of.  Jimmy and I usually email back and forth all day long.  He wrote in the afternoon that he was worried about me, but I never saw it, because I was too busy to go on Yahoo.

He texted me tonight, because he was really worried, and I texted him back.  I was at Bob’s house, working with the window treatment girl from Smith + Noble, but he probably forgot!

I called Eric at 8:00pm, because I knew I wasn’t going to get home for hours.  He was disappointed that I had to get off the phone so quickly, but at that point the window treatment girl was giving us the prices (yikes!) and I had to be there to help.  He sounded good and said work was going okay.  I told him I'd call him tomorrow, while I'm waiting for the RV inspector!

The boss at my morning job got back today from a 4-week sabbatical and she’s leaving at 5:00am tomorrow for a 3-day conference, so you can imagine what my morning was like.

My afternoon was CRAZY, because there were 55 resumes emailed to me over the weekend and I had to print out as many as I could and get them processed.  It was a nutty day, but always fun in HR.  The girls are planning an HR happy hour before two of the girls go on sabbatical in October.  We’re also planning to go see MAMA MIA on Friday night.  They’re also planning another birthday party (with 11 girls in the group it seems it’s always someone’s birthday!).  So, there was a lot of buzzing around and I was trying to get my work done and get in on the action, too!

Bob came to get me a little after 4:00pm and we went to his house.  He had just moved in over the weekend and it was a bit of a mess, but you can see how great it’s all going to be once he has a chance to unpack.

The Smith + Noble girl was adorable and really knowledgable and helpful.  He got roman shades and drapes in the living room, a coordinating roman shade in the dining room (you can see each window from the other room), natural woven bamboo shades in the den (on a huge picture window and panels that slide for a sliding door, and drapes in the master bedroom with more natural woven bamboo shades for the closet doors.

The closet doors there now are huge ugly wood sliders and they’re so hard to move and horrible to look at.  He can keep the shades up all the time and they’re out of the way and his clothes are easily accessible, and then when company comes he rolls them down and – voila! – natural, beautiful treatments!

It’s costing him a fortune, but I told him it’s an investment in the house, and it’s something you don’t do very often, so you might as well get quality stuff.  He wants a grown up house – and doesn’t want it to look like a college dorm, or a first apartment – so you have to spend money to get that effect.

It got much later than we expected, so we ordered in pizza, but only Bob and I ate.  The Smith + Noble girl was too busy with her calculator, adding up the thousands of dollars this would all cost!  She was a doll, and I was elbowing Bob after she left and telling him there’s nothing wrong with dating your window treatment girl!  I DID hear him invite her to his housewarming party (the date is yet to be determined), so I guess he liked her, too!

Now I’m finally home, and I’m exhausted.  So, I won’t even get to stay up to watch HEROES, or PRISON BREAK, or DANCING WITH THE STARS – all of which were on tonight!  I’m going to have a lot of catching up to do!

I was really exhausted last night, so I shut off the TV at 11:00pm and fell right to sleep.  I woke up and it was dark.  I had no idea what time it was.  I decided to go to the bathroom, and when I returned, I saw it was 2:15am.  What’s up with that?   I woke up after 3 hours of sleep?  I tossed and turned the rest of the night and when I DID fall back to sleep, intermittently, I had the WEIRDEST dreams!

The good news is, I got to sleep an hour later than usual, so I got up at 7:00am, because I had to be ready for the RV inspector.  He was supposed to come between 8:00am and 1:00pm.  Don’t you hate when you have to wait for the repairman, or the delivery man, or the cable guy, and they give you that 4 or 5 hour window and you just have to wait?

I was dressed and ready at 8:00am.  I spoke to Eric, deposited my check in the bank across the street, paid some bills, wrote some emails, cleaned the apartment, and he finally came at a little before noon.  It was depressing, because I could have slept until 10:00am, but of course things never work out that way!

I told him I had to get to work and showed him where he could drop the RV keys in the building manager’s mailbox when he was done and I was off!  I got to work a little after noon and went immediately to HR.  I spoke to the woman upstairs this morning and she said it was okay that I didn’t spend anytime up there today.  That was a relief!

Bob had given me two slices of pizza last night that was leftover, and I brought in a piece for lunch today.  I worked until 1:30pm printing emails and then I heated the pizza up in the microwave for 45 seconds and had lunch.  It was a veggie pizza and it was just as good as last night!

I worked really hard all afternoon, processing resumes, and setting up appointments for interviews with candidates.  I realized since I had my own car I could stay late, so I asked if I could do some overtime, because I had so much work to do, and this way I could make up a few hours I lost this morning.

Elsa said it was fine, so I worked until 7:00pm.  I got home at 7:15pm and made some vegetable soup.  I used a can of organic black beans, some leftover salsa, a box of organic vegetable broth, a lot of celery, some cilantro and some kind of flat string bean (I don’t know what they’re called!).  It came out really good!

I got a few emails from my niece, Melissa.  She's doing better, although she's still in a lot of pain.  They'll be sending her home in a few days, but she has a long road of recuperation ahead of her.  She'll probably be out of work for at least a month.  I wish her a super-speedy recovery!

I watched DANCING WITH THE STARS tonight.  I was happy to see Jeffrey Ross go home.  He’s funny, but not a good dancer!  So far, my favorites are Rocco DiSpirito (he's SO cute) and Brooke Burke (she's a really good dancer!).  I was SORELY disappointed in Lance Bass, because I know he can REALLY dance (I loved him in NSYNC).  He looked awkward and like a real beginner!

I’m so nervous about this RV sale.  The inspector told me the report would be online within 24 hours, so I’ll be able to see it tomorrow afternoon.  I’m pretty sure there won’t be any problem with that, but I still worry about the fact that the RV is not registered in California, and that we have a Lien on the title (although I DO have the proper Lien Release letter).  I just know that anything that CAN go wrong WILL go wrong, so I’m expecting problems, and I know I won’t be disappointed!

As for work, no one has said anything about when I’m starting full time in HR, but I’ve been getting lots of training and I’m really looking forward to the day when I only have one computer, one desk, one phone extension, and one floor to go to every day.  It’s going to be a lot less stressful, and I could use less stress right about now!

I woke up again last night at about 2:30am.  I don’t know what this new trend is, but I don’t like it one bit.  At least this time I fell right back to sleep and slept until the alarm went off!

I did a bit of cleaning this morning before I left, because my complex was informed that they would be coming into our apartments today to change light fixtures (if needed), replace regular light bulbs with energy-saving bulbs, change out the piece at the very tip of the faucet in the kitchen and bathroom, and replace the shower head.  I was a little nervous, because all I could think of was that SEINFELD episode where they get the low-flow shower heads and all their hair is flat and greasy-looking.

Fortunately, I already tried the shower out for a second and it feels like it will be fine.  I’ll see for sure tomorrow morning!  They were going to change light fixtures in older apartments, but since ours was turned over in 2007, we already have all new light fixtures and a newer refrigerator.

I had a pretty calm day at work – both upstairs and down.  It was busy, but not too stressful.  We ordered in from Tio Leo’s for lunch and I walked over with a bunch of the girls (it’s across the street) to pick it all up.  I had a cheese quesadilla.  Their food is really good.

I spoke to the woman in HR who is in charge of the department I’m working in upstairs.  I asked her when I’m coming down to HR full time and she said she didn’t know, but she’s working on it.  The sooner the better for me!

I spoke to Eric a few times today.  He was at another job in Manhattan.  The first building he worked at (Thursday, Friday, Monday and Tuesday) was on 61st and 1st.  Now, he’s working on 87th on the East side.  He likes this job better, because he knows his partner – it’s someone he used to work with and they’re friends.  I thought that was great.

He’s working on getting a car and he hopes to have one by the weekend.  That will really make life easier for him and his sister, because right now she’s chauffeuring him around a lot.  He had to go to an OSHA class today (Occupational Safety & Health Administration) after work in Long Island City at the union hall.  I asked Eric how it was and he said, “Bogus!”  Anyway, it’s a requirement.  His sister picks him up and drops him off a lot of places, and he feels so bad bothering her.

Anyway, I left at 5:00pm and got a call from Eric as soon as I finished heating up my soup (which was even better the second time!).  Then, I relaxed and worked on the computer until DANCING WITH THE STARS came on.  I felt bad when Ted McGinley was eliminated, especially since he’s SO much better than Cloris Leachman (and she’s a bit obnoxious, too).

After DWTS I watched AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL.  I just LOVE that show.  There’s so much good TV on these days and since I can only record two shows at a time, I end up missing some shows I’d like to check out – like THE MENTALIST and GARY UNMARRIED.  I’m such a couch potato.  I just love my TV shows, and there are so many to choose from.  Reality, drama, comedy.  It’s all there to enjoy!

It seems like selling the RV is the longest, most tedious process ever.  I think it was easier to sell our house than it was to sell this RV!  There are so many steps to see this thing through, it’s amazing!  Lien releases, VIN numbers, titles, escrow, etc., etc., etc.  What a headache.  I cannot WAIT for this thing to drive off into the sunset.

I’m kind of glad that Eric’s in NY and I’m dealing with this on my own, because I think this would have driven him crazy.  At least I’m handling it, but I am keeping my fingers crossed that something doesn’t go wrong.  You know it ALWAYS does!

I had a pretty uneventful day at work.  It’s just so busy that I don’t have a moment, but – hey – I guess I had all the time I could ever want in the first 5 months I was working there.  Now, they’ve really got me working hard!  I hardly have time to go to the Ladies' Room!

When I got down to HR, we had carrot cake to celebrate one of the girls’ birthdays, so that was fun.  They usually give some kind of gift card as a present.  They have a document on a shared drive that lists all the girls’ likes and dislikes, so when it’s birthday time they know what to get.  I thought that was SO great!  They asked me to fill it out and I did.

The birthday girl today is originally from Boston and she has the CUTEST accent.    People comment on mine all the time, but hers is really adorable!  She just came back from vacation in Boston and New York and was telling me how much she loved NYC. 

I’m happy to report that Eric is starting to look at apartments in Queens.  Since he’s working, he feels he can get one sooner and I’m happy, because I really want him to have an apartment by the time I get there in November.  That way, I'll have a place to stay and I can help him set it up a little.  You know, add that "Peppy Touch!"

So, my session tonight was great, as always.  We talked about the RV and Eric so much and she said she wants to focus on me.  She says once I’ve gotten the RV sold I can focus on myself a lot more.  I’m so caught up in work, Eric, and selling the RV that I’m neglecting myself.  I know it.  I’m still overeating and not exercising.  I just feel it’s all too much sometimes, and I just can’t deal.

Everyone has great ideas for me, to get me motivated to diet ad exercise, but it’s something I have to do on my own.  I guess when I’m ready, I’ll know.  I’m just not ready to get my act together yet!

I’m really looking forward to tomorrow.  After work, I’m going to see MAMA MIA with Elsa and Rosemary, who went with me to see DREAMGIRLS.  We invited all the HR girls, but it looks like it’s just the three of us!  I really need a night out.  I’ve been dying to see MAMA MIA since the movie came out (I saw the Broadway show two times).  It’s such fun music and it will just be a fun night with friends.

On Saturday, the buyer’s supposed to fly down and pick up the RV.  He's got it insured and just needs to get the emissions test and have the VIN # verified.  I just hope all the ducks are in a row, because I’d hate for him to fly down for nothing, and have to wait another week.

Saturday afternoon Bob’s having his first office get-together at the new house.  He’s just barely moved in, but everyone’s dying to see his place.  I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it, because I’ll be with RV guy all afternoon, but – hey – I’ve already seen it!

I had a crazy day today.  Really crazy.  First thing this morning, I faxed the title information with the lien release to the titling company who is handling the transaction for the buyer (through Escrow.com).  She called me a few hours later, and I was very nervous, but the only problem was that the fax was too dark, and she asked me to make a copy, lighten it, and resend.  I was SO relieved.

My relief was short-lived.  She called AGAIN in the afternoon and said there was a problem with the title, because the name on the Lien Release letter was different from the name on the title.  I explained that was because the Lien Release letter was for the PREVIOUS owners.  We never owed any money on it.  The DMV did not receive the information in time, so they put the lien on OUR title.  I had the Lien Release letter for the RV – with the matching VIN #, but it doesn’t matter, because the names don’t match.

I explained it all, and she was very nice.  She said she’d call California DMV and call me back.  She called back to say they wouldn’t accept it and the buyer would not be able to register it.  Woe is me.

Now – all these weeks later – we have to do what we were told to do in the beginning.  I have to send the title with the Lien Release letter to NY DMV and get a clean title without the Lien on it.  I know it will take WEEKS, but the buyer is willing to wait.  He’s been SO nice about it.  I was freaking out this afternoon and wrote him and he said, “Calm down, relax, take a breath.  We’ll get through this.  I’m not going anywhere, so we’ll just wait until you have the paperwork in order and then I’ll come and get it.”

He was so understanding and he’s very patient.  I feel very lucky that he is involved, because he is very organized and he’s doing everything to make this go smoothly.

Unfortunately, there was ANOTHER problem.  The inspector didn’t do a very good inspection, because we had told the buyer about 3 or 4 problems with the RV and the inspector didn’t mention ANY of them in his report!  Also, he told me he wouldn’t be moving or driving the vehicle (and he didn’t), but according to the buyer he was supposed to take it for a test drive in order to test a lot of the driving functions.  The buyer was offered another inspection or his money back, but he really wants another inspection, and I can’t blame him.  That means another morning off.  The office is going to HATE me.  I’ve been so distracted lately, taking time off, making calls, sending emails and faxes during work time.  I’m lucky they like me!

I was SO happy that tonight we were going out to dinner and the movies, because I really needed a night out.  We went to Caramel Valley to a nice shopping center and had dinner in a lovely Greek restaurant (how appropriate for the movie, which was filmed in Greece!).  We shared two appetizers and then shared a falafel platter.  The first appetizer was something I’ve never tried before.  Saganaki – a thick slice of Kesseri Greek cheese, seasoned and seared, then lit aflame at our table!  You eat it with grilled pita bread.  Oopah!  The other appetizer was a trio of dips – babaganoush, taramousalata, and hummus.  Yummus!

We had a great meal and it was a lot of fun hanging out with the girls.  We had a lot of laughs and there were so many things to talk about.  I spoke about Eric for a while and they were so sympathetic and really comforting.  They said they really don’t want me to leave San Diego and it will be so sad when I go.  I told them I felt the same way, and yet I knew I would be leaving before too long.

From the restaurant, we only had to walk about 100 feet and we were in the movie theatre.  It has 12 theatres and they’re all pretty small.  There were about a dozen people seeing MAMA MIA with us.  I really enjoyed it.  It was funny, sweet, and of course the music was great!  I thought Meryl Streep did a great job and she’s a really good singer!

Everyone complained about Pierce Brosnan’s singing, but I didn’t think he was so bad.  I had a lot of fun and am so glad we went.

Rosemary drove us all there, and then she dropped us back at the garage and Elsa took me home.  I got in a little after 10:00pm.  I’m exhausted, so I’m going to just get ready for bed and watch a little TV until my eyes close. 

Tomorrow I’m going to try to get a mani/pedi (I need it badly), do laundry, and run some errands.  I decided I’m not going to go to Bob’s party.  I’m just not in a party mood.  I enjoy being with people, but these are all people from the office, and they’ll ask where Eric is, and I don’t feel like answering a lot of questions.  I’m slowly but surely opening up and telling more and more people that Eric is in NY, but I don’t want it to be a topic of conversation at Bob’s house!  I think I’ll just stay home and relax by myself this weekend.  I really want to do some decoupage!

If I never talk on the phone again, it will be too soon!  I’m SO sick of the phone!  I’ve never been much of a phone talker (well, at least, not since I was in Junior High) and it seems lately I’ve been on the phone constantly with all the stuff going on in my life.

I woke up at 8:30am and thought I’d give Eric a call right away, since I didn’t talk to him last night, because I was out with my girlfriends.  He was riding his bicycle, and it started to rain, so he had to turn around and go home.  Poor baby.  I was so happy to hear he was riding, and then he told me it was pouring and he was soaked.  Welcome to New York!  It hasn’t rained in San Diego since APRIL!  I know that’s not good, because it’s dry as a bone here, but at least the weather’s predictable!

Anyway, I tried to get an appointment to get my hair cut and colored, but he couldn’t take me until Monday.  I was able to get a pedicure appointment at noon, so I got dressed and went to the shopping center, stopping at the STARBUCKS drive-through along the way.  What a convenience!

I really enjoy my pedicures with Tina.  She does such a good job and her leg and foot massages are to die for.  I read magazines and just relax and feel the tension ebb away.  Unfortunately, as soon as I got in the car I called Eric again, and it all started again.  He was heading up to Mahopac to buy a car from his friend.  He really needs a car, because his sister has been chauffering him all over the place and it’s a big pain.

I had the assignment of getting in touch with the insurance company.  I was informed that he will need a New York policy, and we now have a California policy, so he’ll have to have his own policy, which will be linked with our other policy.  VERY complicated.  I was on the phone for about 20 minutes, and then the woman told me they were understaffed on Saturdays and to call back in an hour!  I did, and got more information, but I still have to call them back on Monday with the VIN #, year, make and model number and they will fax the temporary insurance cards to Eric’s sister, and then Eric will go to DMV and register the car and will also get his NY Driver’s License back.

Susan said in NY you don’t have to take the written driving test, which we did when we got to California.  So, at least that will be easier for him.

I spoke to Geri.  I spoke to Susan.  I spoke to my sister-in-law, Susan.  I spoke to my Mom and Dad (at length).  My mom lost a really good friend to cancer.  This woman has been fighting for about 10 years and she passed yesterday.  My mother is heartbroken. I feel so bad.

I left a message for my niece, Melissa, who is now home from the hospital and will be at home recouperating for the next 6-8 weeks.  GET WELL SOON, MELISSA!  We love you!  Then, I spoke to Eric about 3 or 4 more times. 

I did have a pleasant surprise this week.  A woman found my website and commissioned me to make two pieces for her – one decoupage and one jewelry mosaic.  She is SO sweet and friendly and she really loves my work.  I was SO happy!  She lives in Costa Mesa, California (I don’t even know where that is!).

So, today I started sorting through all my broken jewelry to find what I will need to do this project.  She likes gold and purple, so I put aside a tray of things that I think might work.  I always put a lot aside and then, as I work, I figure out what to use and what won’t work.  It’s like working on a puzzle – each piece has to fit perfectly!

The pieces she wants are two hand mirrors.  One is for her daughter, who owns a yoga studio, and the back will be decoupaged with yoga-inspired pictures.  The other is for her (to replace one that broke) and the back will be bejeweled with mostly purple and gold and some other colors thrown in for variety.

I don’t have the hand-mirrors, so I went shopping on ebay and managed to find some.  I just have to wait for them to arrive and I can get to work.  I haven’t yet started my other project – the memory box for the newly-engaged girl in HR.  She’s supposed to get the box this weekend and then give me all the things she wants to go on it – ticket stubs, cards, and other memorabilia.  I can’t wait to do that.  It will be so much fun.

After my pedicure I went to PETCO to pick up some stuff for Conrad.  I got vitamin drops to put in his water and a special mist to spray on him that keeps his feathers moist and luxurious!  It’s like conditioner for birds!  Unfortunately, he didn't like being spritzed too much.  I think I really freaked him out!  I guess he'll get used to it as time goes on, but the first time was definitely not fun!

After PETCO I went to Michael’s to find some purple crystals and rhinestones for the jewelry mosaic and I was able to find some nice things for the project.  Then, I headed home and immediately started two loads of laundry.

Tonight I did Conrad’s weekly cage cleaning.  He hated it, because Eric wasn’t here to hold him while I cleaned out his cage, but we got through it.  It’s always so nice when his cage is totally clean, but after a few days there’s seed and his down (which he’s always pulling when grooming himself) all over the cage.

I watched a lot of decorating shows on HGTV tonight – Deserving Design, Design on a Dime, Color Splash, Color Correction, Rate My Space, and Divine Design.  I love decorating shows!

I’m looking forward to SNL tonight, because Anna Faris (of HOUSE BUNNY fame) is the host.  She’s adorable and it should be fun!

You may remember that I was invited to a party at Bob’s house this afternoon, but I decided not to go.  First I thought I wouldn’t be able to make it because the buyer was supposed to pick up the RV today, but when that was cancelled I decided not to go, because I just wasn’t in the mood to answer questions about Eric’s whereabouts.

I know I could have just said, “He’s away,” but I wasn’t in a party mood anyway, and it felt fine just staying home and getting things accomplished around the apartment.  Anyway, I had a great night out on Friday, so at least I had some real fun this weekend!

Today is my niece Keri's birthday.  She's 24.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY KERI!

Last night, I was wide awake at midnight.  I was worried I wouldn’t sleep, so I took TYLENOL PM.  I started watching SNL, and I got really tired, shut off the TV and went to sleep.

I slept like a log and woke up at 8:00am.  I guess I got 8 hours, so I should have been okay, but I was SO groggy.  I just stayed in bed and watched some TV (SNL from last night) and then I started thinking about the RV, which has been on the street for a week now.  I decided to get dressed and go check it out to make sure it was okay.  It was fine, but there were no cars for about 100 feet in front of it, so I decided to move it, just so it wouldn’t be in the same spot all the time and it would look like someone’s actually driving it.

It was pretty easy, since I just had to drive straight up about 100 feet.  Then, I went back inside and had breakfast, worked on the computer, and cleaned the apartment.  The problem was, I felt like I was in a fog.  I used those pills a few times before and they DO make me groggy, but this was ridiculous.

I decided to lay down again at about 1:00pm.  The problem is, it was hot out, so I had the windows open and a bunch of guys across the way were watching the CHARGERS game and they kept screaming and shouting when it was exciting, which made it really hard to nap.

I finally got up, showered, got dressed and went food shopping.  First, I walked to the mail box and it was pretty hot out and I was walking up hill really fast, so I was literally dripping by the time I got to KEIL’S.  I did a fast food shopping – I got TWO 12-pack cases of SNAPPLE with no broken bottles.  Wheeeeee!  I also got a bunch of veggies to make a big salad and that was about it.

When I got back I was drenched and it was hot in the apartment, so I threw on my bathing suit and went for a swim.  It’s the end of September and it was still hot enough out and the water was still warm enough.  It felt GREAT!  I did 4 laps and just enjoyed the cool water.  By the afternoon the pool is completely in the shade, so I don’t have to worry about getting a sunburn. 

When I got back inside I took a fast shower and then relaxed for a while before making dinner.  I made a big salad – enough for dinner tonight and for lunch tomorrow.

I enjoyed my salad while I watched TRADING SPACES.  It was about two sisters who fight all the time.  They did the living room in a Moroccan style for one sister, and a master bedroom in a modern goth style (purple and white) for the other.  They were both pretty fabulous!  I love the jewel tones in Moroccan design and think it’s perfect for a shared space like a living room or dining room, because it’s fun for entertaining!

Tomorrow I have to fax a letter to NY DMV to find out if there’s going to be a problem getting a new clean title for the RV with MY name on the title with the lien and the old seller’s name on the Lien Release.  This is what caused the problem with the titling company, so that's why I need a new title.  I just hope NY DMV doesn't give me a hard time!

I also have to get in touch with our insurance company to get Eric’s new car added to our insurance.  I’m SO busy at work, but Eric’s not in a place where he can make phone calls, and I don’t want his sister to have to take care of everything (she’s taking him to DMV tomorrow to register it, once I have the car insured).  It’s a 1996 Mitsubishi Gallant with over 100,000 miles on it, but it’s just to get him around town so I think it’s fine.

I really feel the weight of the world on my shoulders lately.  It didn’t get any easier when Eric left.  In a way, it got harder, because I’m still doing things for him, but there’s the 3-hour time difference to deal with, and the fact that he’s so far away.  I want him to be able to do things on his own, for himself, but I guess he has to take it one step at a time.

So, until he’s got his act together, he’s still relying on me (and his sister) for a lot and it’s just draining.  Once he’s got a car, life will be easier for his sister, because she won’t have to chaffeur him around anymore, which I know is SO hard on her.  He’ll be able to drive to the express bus, and also run any errands he has to run in order to get an apartment, etc.

Tomorrow I’m going right after work to get my hair cut and colored.  It isn’t driving me CRAZY like last month, but it HAS been four weeks (BOY time flies – whether you’re having fun or not), so I figured I’d get it over with before the roots get really obvious.

I spoke to our niece, Melissa, this afternoon.  I’m happy to report that she’s home from the hospital, but not resting that comfortably.  She has a lot to deal with right now.  She can’t even sleep in her bed, because it’s too hard to get up, so she’s sleeping on the couch.  She has a long haul ahead of her, but she’s super-strong, brave and resilient, so I know she’ll be fine.  I really admire her, because she really doesn’t complain.  She just tells it like it is, and always says she knows it will get better.  I love her so much and it really kills me that she has had to go through all this.

Well, it’s going to be a busy week, and I’ve got to get a good night’s sleep, so I’ll close now.  I’m hanging in there and I still believe everything will turn out okay.  I have to believe.  I have no other choice.

What a day!  I was so busy at work – both upstairs and down – and inbetween all the projects I’m working on, I managed to get Eric’s car insured and the paperwork faxed to his sister, and I got all the information I needed to send the paperwork to NY DMV for us to get a clean title for the RV.

I faxed a letter to the woman at NY DMV this morning and she was kind enough to call me this afternoon and walk me through exactly what to do.  What a doll!  I’ve got everything together and the only thing that can possibly go wrong is that she tells me the lien release letter is not an original.  It’s funny, because I always consider the original of a letter to be on special bond paper with a colored letterhead.  This is all black and white and it looks like a copy to me, but it’s what the bank sent, so I have to hope for the best.

I’ll send it out tomorrow via UPS or FED EX from my office and include a pre-paid return envelope, so it will get to me ASAP.

When Elsa dropped me off after work I immediately got in the car and drove to Hillcrest to HAIRSPRAY to get my hair cut and colored by John.  I’m dying to get my hair cut short, but John and I agreed I should lose a little more weight before I do it.  I’ve just got a chubby face right now and the short hair would only emphasize it.

He did give me more than just a trim – he took off at least two inches, but it’s still not as short as I’d like.  I guess if I start losing weight and get it trimmed more and more each time, by the time I go to NY in November I’ll have my short haircut!

When I got home I heated up some vegetable soup (I still had some left) and watched DR. PHIL.  Then, I worked on getting everything together for NY DMV and then watched DANCING WITH THE STARS.  Lance Bass is my favorite.  I loved him in NSYNC and I really like his personality.  I don’t think he’s the greatest ballroom dancer, but boy can he dance!  He was one of the best dancers in NSYNC.

Eric was at his sister Robin’s house tonight.  They had a Rosh Hashanah dinner and he got to see everybody at once.  I’m pretty sure Melissa wasn’t there, but I don’t know for sure.  My niece, Stephanie (Melissa’s sister) texted me a few times and told me that she misses me and she knows how hard this has been for me and Eric.  It’s nice to know our nieces are worried about us.  They know how much we love each other and they feel terrible that we’re going through this.  I told her that we will get through it, and that it will get better.  I promise.

When I spoke to Eric tonight (I was in the chair at the salon with dye all over my hair) he sounded great.  I think being with the family is always good for him.  That’s one thing about Eric – he likes to be around friends and family.  He really enjoyed visiting with our friends and family in L.A., too.

Elsa is going on sabbatical next week, so I’ll be driving to and from work by myself for a whole month.  I don’t mind at all, but that means I’ll have to put gas in the car that much sooner and I HATE pumping gas.  First of all, I can NEVER get the pumps to work correctly, and also I hate the smell of gas (it makes me nauseated) and I am paranoid that I’m going to go up in flames.  I’ve only pumped gas about 4 times in my entire life, and I’ve never had a good experience.

Right now, as I’m typing this, Conrad is chirping like crazy.  I find now that when I leave the room he chirps until I come back – like he misses me.  It’s the cutest thing.  It’s like he’s calling to me.  We’ve really bonded and become better friends since Eric left, because he’s the only one I have to talk to, so of course I’ve been paying him more attention than ever and, of course, he’s loving it!  He is the cutest and I’m SO SO happy I have him to keep me company.

Anyway, Elsa’s leaving and another girl in HR is going on sabbatical, too, and I’m going to be taking over her job, so it’s going to get crazy in HR.  They’re trying to get me there full time by next week (I’m PRAYING) and they’re even going to bring in a temp to assist me.  Can you believe it?  A temp to assist the temp!  It’s just that there’s so much work and if I’m taking over for the other girl, there’s no way I can do everything – even if I’m there 8 hours a day – so if I have someone to help me it will all get done!

I signed up with a Marketing Focus Group when we first moved here and they’ve called me several times to see if I qualified to attend and I finally did tonight.  It’s 8 hours on Saturday and they pay $175.  They serve breakfast and lunch, and they say we’ll be watching videos, having discussions and being interviewed in a group.

I used to do a lot of Marketing Focus Groups in the '80s and made a lot of money just talking and giving my opinion.  I always enjoyed these sessions and I am glad I’m finally getting to do it again.  I never would have done this if Eric was here, because it's the entire day, but I figure I have nothing better to do, and I usually do my food shopping on Sunday!  I’ll do laundry on Friday night, go to sleep early and be there by 9:00am.

I’m not sure what the subject matter is, but she asked me a few questions about if I ever went to law school or had lawyers in my immediate family.  Interesting!  I guess I’ll find out on Saturday!

I woke up this morning with one thing on my mind – NY DMV!  I was nervous about sending the documents and couldn’t wait to get to work to take care of it.

First thing I did when I got to my desk is put down my stuff and go down to the mailroom.  They will send out packages for you, and you just bring a check to pay for it.  I sent the envelope NEXT DAY (which means it should be there by 10:30am tomorrow) and put a return envelope inside for the same delivery back.

Now, it’s out of my hands (literally and figuratively) and I just have to hope for the best – and you know how THAT can go!  I do have a tracking number, so I’ll check tomorrow morning before I leave for work to see where it is.

I had a super-busy day at my morning shift, but I did have a chance to speak to the boss.  She started telling me about a new responsibility she wanted me to take on, and I had to stop her and tell her that I was not going to be there much longer.  I really wanted the girl in HR to tell her (she had a meeting with her this morning – but not before this conversation), but I couldn’t just sit there and nod and say okay when I knew I wasn’t going to be there.

I explained the whole situation to her – how working the two shifts was getting stressful for me, because I felt like I never was caught up at either job and it was frustrating, too.  I also explained that I had “some things” going on in my personal life which was adding to my stress and I was afraid I wouldn’t do a good job, because I was very distracted.  She was REALLY understanding.  It seemed important to her to know that it wasn’t them – that I wasn’t unhappy with the department, or my co-workers.  I explained that I loved them, and that they were wonderful to me, and I really even enjoyed the work, it was just too hard to do it for just 4 hours a day.

She asked if I would be okay working one day in one department and another day in another department, but I told her that it would be exactly the same thing – I’d just be a whole day behind somewhere! 

Later that morning the girl from HR came up to talk to her.  They were behind closed doors for almost an hour.  I was nervous, but confident that it would turn out okay.

When I got down to HR she immediately brought me into her office and explained the situation.  She was going to start looking for another temp right away, but she thought it might take up to two weeks.  I couldn’t do anything else but agree, because I don’t want to leave them high and dry, and a few more weeks won’t kill me (I hope!).

She said they want to try to hire a temp-to-hire, so they’re going to telephone interview them and then bring them in for a face-to-face, which they usually don’t do with temps.  They are still trying to get this job qualified for a full-time employee, which is one of the big frustrations, but if they can get a temp who will eventually come on staff when the job is approved, then they won’t have to train someone else.  It really is a very complicated job and I’m just now – after three months – feeling really confident about some of the procedures, so training a temp and then having to train a full-time employee would just be really hard.  I offered to help train the temp, and they really appreciated that.  It’s not something that they would ordinarily do – having a temp train a temp – but, hey, I trained the girl who replaced me at my other job! 

I’ve now been with the firm for 8 months.  It’s amazing.  I’m learning more and more in HR.  I’m getting trained a little bit every day by the woman who sits right next to me and who is going on sabbatical next week.  She’ll be gone before I get down there full time, but the new HR temp is starting tomorrow.  She’ll be doing a lot of filing work for some of the other girls (because I’m too busy to do it!), but they said she’ll also be assisting me.  The only thing I really need her to do is print out all the resumes and save them to the appropriate folders, because that takes hours every day and for the last two days there have been 100 or more resumes in the inbox every morning!

There is one job that is called a Research Associate and they hire 5 college graduates who commit to work for a year.  It’s a job that’s posted on different college job websites – like Penn State, Brigham Young, and other schools.  Since we’re a top firm, and they know there are 5 positions open, we’ve been getting 50-60 resumes for that job every day.  It’s CRAZY!  They’re all college students, so they don’t have much work experience, so it’s mostly about their student records.

Having a job with this firm on your resume is an excellent step in a career in investment and finance.  Therefore, this job posting is getting a LOT of attention.

At 4:30pm my phone rang.  It was a woman from the Focus Group and she needed to interview me more (why, I don’t know).  I told her I was at work and to call me back at 5:30pm, when I got home.

Elsa was going to a concert tonight, so we snuck out at 4:30pm, so I was home a little before 5:00pm.  I got undressed and called Eric, so I could talk to him for a while before the woman called back.  We had a great conversation.  I feel bad, because some of his family are questioning my commitment to him and are asking him if our marriage is over.  Did you ever?  Even if you thought that might be the case, would you suggest it or bring it up and ask a man who’s seriously depressed?  They are just not the most considerate people in the world, and I am not there to speak up (which has always been the case).

Eric told me that he told them we’re fine and we’re together, and that I’ll be coming to him, but they don’t believe it.  He also told them it’s his fault this happened (even though that’s not true – it’s no one’s fault – things just happen), but of course they blame me.  It’s always been that way – for 25 years.  Some of his family doesn’t think I’m so great for Eric.  They always thought I pushed him around, or “led him around by the nose.”  I admit I have a strong personality, and maybe I’m more controlling and outspoken than Eric, but everything we did, we did together.

Every decision we made, we made together.  Eric knows I never pushed him to move to California.  It was a dream we BOTH had.  He just didn’t know how it would turn out.  I didn’t either. Who could know?  If you knew something bad was going to happen, would you still do it?  Would ANYBODY?  No.  But they love to place blame, and it’s a lot easier to blame someone who’s 3,000 miles away, isn’t it?  I know I sound bitter and angry, and maybe I am.  I have been a great wife, a wonderful sister-in-law and a fantastic aunt to all my nieces and nephews.  But they just want to find fault.  It’s really sad.  Thank goodness it’s not ALL of them – just some of them.

Some of Eric’s family has been extremely supportive.  My nieces have shown their support and love, and some of Eric’s sisters are behind us 100%.  They are very understanding and it means the world to me.  After 25 years, they’re really like sisters to me, and it’s nice to know how much they love and encourage us.  Thanks to them, I think Eric is on the road to recovery.

Anyway, after I spoke to Eric, I decided to lie down and wait for the call.  Next thing I knew, it was 8:00pm.  I had slept an hour-and-a-half and she never called!  I hope she calls tomorrow, because I’m assuming this conversation was necessary in order for me to participate on Saturday.

I decided to have a bowl of cereal for dinner.  It’s one of those healthy cereals Eric bought at COSTCO.  Not very tasty, but very nutritious and filling! 

I watched THE BIGGEST LOSER.  It’s a great show, but I feel awful guilty when they’re working out and sweating and crying and losing weight and I’m laying in bed talking to Conrad on the commercials!  I just cannot get myself motivated to exercise.  Every day I say, “Today’s the day!” and then it isn’t.  I’m eating well, and I have lost 2 pounds, but think of how much more I could lose if I actually got some exercise!

Oh, one thing I forgot to mention.  This girl at work (who has seen my jewelry mosaics) gave me a bag of vintage clip-on earrings that belonged to her mother and grandmother.  It was all fabulous – exactly what I love to use in my crafts!  I told her I’m working on a commissioned piece for someone and she requested purple and there were two pairs of gorgeous purple earrings.  I SO appreciated that she thought of me and gave it to me.  I can’t wait until the hand mirror I bought on ebay arrives, so I can get started!